dd is still calling down the stairs? Any advice please?

[AbRoller]

DD(7yo) has been in bed since half 8 and is still calling down stairs.

If it was for another drink, a different teddy or other delay tactic I would be cross with her but she keeps calling 'love you Mam'.

She went to bed quite happy and it's starting to worry and confuse me now. Been going on for a few weeks, every few nights.

On one hand I feel it's just for attention and not wanting to go asleep and that I need to let her know it's not on but on the other hand I'm worried why she needs to constantly tell me and for me to say it back?

I tell her lots throughout the day and we have lots of cuddles.

It also worried me that for the first time in years she wet the bed last night. I've asked her if there's anything wrong but she says no.

Could I be missing something?

Any opinions/advice appreciated

TIA

Is school ok at the moment?

I was called in a couple of weeks ago for a chat with her teacher re her behaviour. There was a arguement between her and another little girl and DD pushed her but I think that's all blown over. I've talked to the teacher since and DD and both say great improvement and they're 'bestest pals' again.

We live apart from her Dad but he and I have a great relationship, better than when we were going out! DD speaks with him a couple of times a day and I can't see any problems there.

Maybe I'm over-reacting but I hate the thought of her being upset about something and not being able to tell me. Other than ask her though, what can I do?

an arguement

Let her know that there is nothing that she cant tell you and that you care about how she feels and reassure her that youlove her and nothing could change that Ever.

Think you also to assert that you love her too and that she needs to go to sleep because otherwise she will be tired and not have fun because she will be too tired.

tnx Awen. I have reassured her and told her I love her and that I know she loves me. Have been up the stairs several times. When she calls down I can't bring myself to give out, I just keep saying 'I know, I love you too, go asleep now, good girl'.

Have just checked, she's asleep

I'm normally a trial and error Mammy and I feel we do ok for our little family. I get cross lots, not perfect by a long shot but this time I can't.

After all the reassure do you think she might be pushing her luck, can 7 year olds rationalize and manipulate to that degree - 'If I say I love her she can't give out'?

I don't think so (1st time mother though!) which is why the persistance is worrying.

1st time mum here too have a 7 year old ds. He is a sensitive lovely boy and I often over analyse i think. Sign of caring I think and wanting to best for them. You soind like a lovely mum.

Maybe get her some storytapes for bedtime.
helps their little brains from ticking over too much about things that might be worrying them, ime.

At around that age I started having thoughts/dreams about Mum dying which led to some very sleepless nights for both of us while she repeatedly reassured me it would be the last thing she did! Perhaps she is worrying about something similar.

What you tend to find with people is that they say things they want YOU to say. Such as when someone keeps asking "are you ok?" they're generally saying "I'm not feeling 100% ok, reassure me" so perhaps she's craving attention in an affection sense? not that it sounds like you don't show her enough love and affection, at all!

Maybe it's just a bit of a phase, girls can get quite dramatic around that age. Hope it resolves itself soon, but you sound like you're doing a terrific job.

ladies, thank you so much. I feel a lot more settled now and have a little grin, it's nice to be told you're doing a good job.

Banana, it's interesting what you said because a week or so ago when she was hugging me she started to cry and when I asked why, she said 'because I love you so much'. We will have a chat tomorrow and hopefully put her mind at ease.

again, thank you all. Much appreciated