Ds distancing himself from rest of class

[mycheapshoes]

Ds (6, yr 2) has been quite upset recently about having no friends. Having unpicked the situation and spoken to his teacher it appears there is a core group of ‘naughty/macho’ boys who DS doesn’t want to play with because he doesn’t like their behaviour.

I’ve witnessed this behaviour at parties etc and have to say it’s not nice-a lot of talk about girlfriends (using inappropriate ‘sexy’ language) horrible gestures, rudeness, fortnite stuff etc.
I’m pleased in a way that Ds doesn’t want to associate with these boys but all the other boys do so he is left out.

In previous years he has played a lot with the girls but I think they are starting to close ranks a bit and stick with each other more.

Also one of his good girl friends is much admired by the leader of the boys and this has led to nasty comments.

Ds is not a ‘goodie goodie’ by any means. He can be rough and silly and in a way it’s good that he’s not picking up any more bad habits from these boys.

Do I just trust the school to sort out the other boys behaviour? I’ve invited a couple of other boys round and they’ve had a good time but at school they want to play with the ‘cool’ boys.

Has the teacher offered any advice OP? Has he got things he can go to outside of school like Beavers?

The teacher said she’d had strong words with the class when he was upset at school and told them that she didn’t want anyone to feel like they had no friends.
She also said that they were aware of and in the process of dealing with the behaviour of the other boys but I think that will be a long term battle.

He does go to beavers and enjoys it. He also has a really good friend in the year below at school who he sees a lot outside of school.

He’ll be with this class until secondary school.

I think school need to be doing more if I’m honest. Do they have anything on at break time like sports or games for the children to join in if they want to? Have you asked her what he should do at break if he’s feeling upset or if nobody will play with him?

Hmm I will speak to her again and ask those questions.
I don’t think most of them are actively leaving him out but it’s not as simple as him compromising on what to play which is the advice I’d usually give because I agree with him that their behaviour isn’t something he should be getting involved in.

Are there any other boys in the class that aren't a part of this group?

There’s 1. He’s a sweet little boy and I’ve encouraged Ds to play with him as much to make sure he’s not left out either as to help Ds.
I’m sure there must be others on the periphery who might be persuaded away but teacher has confirmed the group has a very strong pull.