Visiting parent

[2mumfamily]

Hi, please can you help me. Seven years ago my ex husband walked out and left me and our two daughters (5&3 at the time) behind along with the mortgage and a bucket full of debt. Over the years I have re married and have moved. My new partners job means we have to move every 2-3 years. We now live 3 hours away from the girls dads house. He sees them once a month and his CMS payments reflect the he does the travelling as he is the visiting parent. I will not do any of the travelling as the only effort he has to make is to travel to collect them and his CMS payments reflect that he does the travelling. Bare in mind that he’s never attended a sports day, parents evening nor and other event I have invited him to. He’s spent every opportunity possible bad mouthing me to our daughters and not supporting me with any decisions regarding education. He wants me to do 50% of the driving. Am I wrong for not making more effort so that he can make less. Also he has a new partner and home and I have another child in my new marriage and I don’t always have access to a car as it’s needed for my partners work. Am I being the worst ex wife or is he being a lazy father??

Neither.
I can see both sides.
Obviously - you have given us your pov, and he will point out the other side, that it is you who has moved away. If you have moved 3 hours away, then presumably he has to do a 6 hour round trip, twice in the weekend. That is a LOT of driving - particularly if it has to be after work or whatever.
The whole situation isn't ideal, but you will do the best by your dc if you both try to work together, compromise and be a bit flexible whenever you can, rather than seeing everything as black and white and a simple, straightforward choice.

Tbh if he was the reason the marriage broke down I'd be tempted to make him do all the leg work. You didn't choose this life, he did so he can make it work.

Your relationship with him has nothing to do with his relationship with his children (unless he was abusive). You have chosen to move away so it is only fair that you share the traveling.