Worried about 8 month old daughter

[SamJay1990]

Hi all

My baby girl is 8 months old & I'm starting to get a bit concerned about her lack of communication/interaction with other people.
At home with me & her dad she's an absolute joy, very chatty smiley etc however with other people she is completely silent. Will not smile not matter what they or we do, and just stares at them. For example she comes with me to my aunt's house on the same road twice a week and we spend a couple of hours there, but everytime we go it's as if she's never seen them before, very timid and quiet. I just want people to see the happy baby we see, and I keep getting people asking if she's always like this and referring to her as a grumpy baby.

Anyone elses baby like this and or did they grow out of it.

Thanks x

My middle child was the exact same. It could be embarrassing at times, he totally blanked people at home he was absolutely fine but in public he was overly shy. My family called him grumpy and always asked why he was so serious... but at home he was nothing like that!

Anyway he did grow out of it, and he’s ridiculously intelligent now too. I have no idea why he was like that when he was younger but it did last until he was about 5, although got much better about 2/3

My toddler has done this since around 6 months, infact they used to cry if people other than DH & I spoke to them. Even with other family members, I agree it’s embarrassing and I always feel I have to apologise... Someone told me it’s a form of stranger anxiety.

That’s really normal at 8 months. It’s sort of the stranger anxiety side of separation anxiety. Unless they are staying in the care of another adult they’ve formed a close attachment too (someone who looks after them several days a week without you there), they are often disinterested to outright afraid of strangers at a point. It’s not a bad thing though. It just means she’s formed strong attachments to her main caregivers (you), which is exactly what she should be doing. My first would literally sob if strangers got too close to her from about 7-11 months! It passed eventually and she suddenly was a very confident, outgoing toddler.

These responses have really reassured me, thankyou! It can be embarrassing when others are really trying and she won't smile, and often turns her head away from them I do show them videos of her at home and how happy and playful she is with me and her dad! She's been super aware since day 1 actually always taking in her surroundings and doesn't miss a trick, maybe it is because she's just processing a lot and as was mentioned has a strong attachment to her us, which can't be a bad thing!

I'm remembering the child of an acquaintance who is now a gorgeous nearly 3 yr old, but for quite a while did a very good "hard stare" (Paddington Bear like) and was certainly not about to be passed around for cuddles.

I'm glad you've found people's responses reassuring :)

My DD used to scream at even close family members just for looking at her. She's a happy and very social 3 year old now so she must've got over it at some point!