Ds behaviour driving me crazy!

[Greywillow12]

Hi there just wanting s vent or to see if anyone has any words of wisdome regarding my ds7 behaviour. Honestly don’t know what to do with him anymore.

His behaviour at school is appalling. Examples are being horrible to the teachers talking back, carrying on, not listening or doing work. Also he’s behaviour to his friends is terrible he’s biting and kicking them.

At home from the moment he gets up it’s a battle, he refuses to get out of bed sometimes I have to lift him out of bed etc . Then I just feel like I’m constantly haveing to remind him to go to the toilet get changed this is all met by horrible language taking the piss out of me basically.

He’s also started kicking me if he doesn’t get his way. I’m so worn down by it. He’s making me miserable.

What I have tried so far is taking away things such as Xbox time and his Nintendo. Which doesn’t work.

Putting him to his room to calm down. He just wrecks the place !

Sorry it’s so long I just needed to get it off my chest! He wasn’t always like this and don’t know what to do 🙁

Thanks for reading

Try taking him to a homeopath and a holistic nutritionist. These people will assess your son as a wholemind, body and emotionsand remarkable changes can occur with suitable prescriptions and dietary changes, I can promise you. None of this precludes having to do the 'proper parenting' measures, which I think you also need help on, but it can help hugely. Many of these children are in constant physical discomfort, which they are often not aware of themselves. Scientists are just beginning to get to grips with it through studying the gut microbiome. But don't wait for them to come up with the data--get going on the shortcuts I've mentioned now.

When you say taking away Xbox/Nintendo time doesn't work... does that mean you've stopped taking them away?

Hi thanks for the replies. We live in the middle of no where so I doubt very much there would be something like that anywhere near us.

No he still gets them taken off him . Infact he hasn’t had them for over a week now because his behaviour is terrible.

It’s like he doesn’t even care?

Not a magic answer but when things start to escalate in terms of punishment like this a totally different approach might be needed. Read how to talk so kids will listen. How you request things or enquire about their day etc can diffuse a situation.

Chores solve all in our house.
Gives them a chance to redeem themselves, some time to reconnect with you - especially if they have flounced off /been sent to another room.
And you get chores done faster with extra hands.
Tried and tested for over 25years!
Gives them an idea of how hard you work for their home too.

His dad is great so no problem there. He is just as fed up with his behaviour to. He does get chores to do . I spend one on one time with him at the weekend going swimming his dad takes him camping.

Honestly the first 5 years of his life were great but since starting school his behaviour has got so bad. I know the children he plays with play a big role in this.

I’ve got a meeting next week with his teacher to try and sort something out.

Hi OP, it sounds like your DS behaviour is frustrating you because he doesn't seem to care about the consequences you've given him. One of my daughters was a bit like this, she wrecked our house at every possible opportunity and she was even quite violent toward me (just me). It was extremely difficult and I really thought I was starting to even question my love for her. It was also quite difficult in general to maintain a reasonable relationship with my husband and with my other daughter because I was so tired from all the violence and fear (of my own reactions). However, I started using therapeutic parenting techniques and 6 months into them, she was transformed. It's been a year now, and she really is a completely different child and a real joy to be around for us and her friends. TP seems counter-productive and also seemingly goes against what you really want to do (for example, when they shout, you want to shout back but you don't, you remain calm as bloody hard as it is. Or they hit you, and you offer them a hug.) and it sounds bonkers, but it really works. Read Kim Goulding and Dan Hughes. Huge difference to all of our lives.