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Parenting

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Teenage sex

1 reply

keh88 · 20/09/2018 12:01

We have just received a call from my 14 y/o step daughters school informing us that she has disclosed to a worker that she is having sex and sex with her boyfriend last week. He is 16/17. She was put on the pill a few weeks ago by her mom mainly to try and manage her periods as she suffers from heavy and irregular periods together with excruciating pain. She told us that her mom made her tell the nurse at the family planning clinic that she is having sex and has continually told us that she isn’t and that she isn’t stupid. Having spoken to her mom she said she didn’t force her to say anything and that she suspected she was having sex but didn’t keno’s for definite. We are now stuck on what to do. Given the boys age we are concerned that he pressured her into it but obviously can’t say for sure because she is known to be a bit of a liar when it comes to some things to try and get herself out of trouble. Do we:
a. Stop her seeing him and potentially make it worse because she’ll just sneak off and see him anyway or potentially self harm as she has in the past
b. Contact the police as it is technically rape as she is only 14 and risk making it worse
c. Contact social services for advice as she seems to be out of control
Our main concern is that she could end up pregnant as we don’t think she has been taking the pill properly. Some advice would be greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
Hernamewasl0la · 21/09/2018 19:23

It’s definitely not an idyllic situation but don’t automatically assume she’s being pressured, as a 15 year old I was having sex with a 17-18 year old because I wanted to and (albeit stupidly) thought we loved each other. However, do have a chat with her and try to ask open ended questions that aren’t just yes/no/dates. I think lying about this is expected, you need to open communication channels. Stress the importance of protection but it wouldn’t hurt to put her off having sex as a whole for a while, maybe with some scarily inflated drastically (although now she’s discovered it who knows how you will)
Please don’t contact the police until you’ve talked to her, it could really ruin this boys future and although legally he’s done something wrong he’s just a kid himself.

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