Does it get better?

[charley39]

I don’t really know what I’m looking for just some support I guess. My DS has just turned 7 months and I am absolutely drained by looking after him. I dread every day now as soon as he wakes up as he is just such hard work. Daytime naps have never been his strong point but around 5-6 months we had got into a good routine with 2-3 good naps a day and would sleep if we were out and about. Since he has learnt how to crawl it has gone from bad to worse. Daytime sleeps are sometimes totalling 1hr all day and by bedtime he is inconsolable. As a result of this his nighttime sleep is now being affected and so I’m up constantly during the night aswell. If out he won’t sleep in his pushchair anymore and I’m lucky if he will even sit in it without complaining. He had bad colic at the start, then reflux but between 5-6months he was a pleasure to look after most days. I think the crawling has made his reflux worse aswell which isn’t helping. I can’t leave the room as he is constantly going everywhere he shouldn’t be even if I try my hardest to block all areas. Won’t be held anymore as just wants to get down and crawl all the time. Every nappy change is a fight as he wants to get up. Just feels like everything is a battle all day. I knew having a baby wasn’t meant to be easy and I thought I was coping relatively well apart from the odd wobble.

I feel like now I’m getting really bad anxiety. As soon as he starts to whine or moan I just feel completely out of control and get so stressed out. I know most of the time this isn’t rational and he isn’t necessarily being bad but it’s got to the point where a slight whine and my heart is pounding.

I suppose I’m just wondering if anyone else has been through this and if there is any light at the end of the tunnel?

Sorry for rambling!

@rubyroot ah perfect I will take a look now, thank you!

My son slept 42 minutes exactly until he was almost 1. I tried everything to extend his naps but it just never happened. BUT it gets so much easier. Sleep schedules naturally lengthen and they do eventually sleep through. My son dropped to 1 nap by 10 months which I thought was mental but actually it was only then that I realised he didn’t actually need as much sleep as the books say he did. Try and follow his lead and not stress out to much about naps. If he’s not slept enough during the day put him down at 6 and have some well needed time to yourself.

The first year was so tough but at 20 months he just needs a story and a good night and then he sleeps for 12 hours solid. I NEVER thought we would get to this stage.

@Jent13c thank you for your message! I keep telling myself to not stress and just go with the flow but then I hear what other babies do or what is the ‘norm’ and it stresses me out again. Glad to hear it got better for you. Trust me bedtime can’t come quick enough so I can just sit and have peace and quiet!

Yes that was me. I had a very high maintenance baby who cried all the time, despite my very best efforts.

He was miserable because he couldn't crawl, then when he could crawl, he was miserable that he couldn't walk, then talk etc! A VERY frustrating time for him and us.

Like you, I hated every day, my stomach would be in knots, I started having panic attacks - god it was awful, you really do have my sympathy.

On a positive note - YES, it absolutely gets better. I cannot emphasise this enough. Mine is almost 4 now and is just a total pleasure to be around.

The early years are so damn hard, especially if you have no help. You panic, thinking "this is it, forever" but it really isn't the case. Yes, there will be some tough times ahead, but just try and ride it out as best you can.

A few things that helped me: wearing foam earplugs during the day to dampen the noise of a screaming baby/toddler. Play music, try and get out for some fresh air every day, accept help from whatever source, try and have a shower every day, I would often go days without showering because I was so stressed and didn't have time (baby can be contained in a playpen/jumperoo if need be), go to groups if you can bare it!

Oh also, in my experience, no it's not "the norm"

I've plenty of friends who really have had sunny, laid back babies. Sure, they must have cried at some point and I don't doubt that the mums found it tough, as we all do. However, there are some babies who are just born frustrated! Mine was definitely one of those.

He talked very early which was interesting - before he was two, you could hold a basic conversation with him. That helped hugely, as soon as he could communicate, he became far happier.

@WhatAPandemonium that reply means so much. Sounds like you felt just like me. I do think a lot of it is frustration as he does seem fairly advanced. Will definitely take the point on getting out for some fresh air every day if possible. It always seems worse when your stuck indoors! I just hope the walking and talking follows shortly! Thank you!

No problem - I think it often helps to hear that someone else has been through the same thing and can really empathise with you.

I'd say you're probably in the thick of it right now, a few tough months ahead until he can walk, but hopefully he will turn a corner when he's more mobile.

Again from personal experience - we turned a massive corner by the time he was two. I know that seems like a long way away, but you will be there before you know it

@WhatAPandemonium yes it will fly by just like the past 7 months have. And yes everyone else I know with babies do not have the same problems so it’s really reassuring to know I’m not alone