AIBU for not wanting to go to my colleagues leaving night out?

[Louba4]

DS is 10 weeks today, and a few weeks back I was invited to a colleagues leaving night out which is tonight.

I’ve only been in this job a year, and this is my 4th month of Mat leave so it would be really good to see everyone outside of work. I’ve been on one night out with them whilst I was pregnant which was okay, I just felt a little awkward being the only one not drinking etc.

My main reason for not wanting to go is leaving DS, even though he’ll be in the completely capable hands of his Dad/DP. I’ve been away from him a couple of times for a couple of hours at a time, and my parents have looked after him for a few hours twice so me and DP could have a rest, but both those times I was just thinking about DS and worrying he was missing me!

I know that if I don’t go I’ll be disappointed about missing out, and it would be help ease anxiety for when I return to work but I just really don’t want to!

I’ve been offered a lift by a colleague and DP has said he would pick me up, so I guess I wouldn’t have to stay out too long. What would you do in my situation? And if you went would you drink?

Thanks!!

Wild horses wouldn't keep me in!!
You are allowed to have a night out!! Dm duties can be resumed when you get home!!
Have a drink if you aren't bf /doing the baby night run!!
Have fun - it's allowed!!

Go and have fun! Have a drink top, your tolerance will be way lower though so be careful.

Could you get a taxi home so you're not concerned about the time you want your DH to collect you at incase the baby is asleep/feeding etc.

Too not top*

One drink won’t hurt if you are BF, and it’s good to get out sometimes. I personally would go, but if you don’t actually want to you are allowed to say no. :)

But I would go, even if just for a short time (“sorry guys, got to be off, baby’s going to need a feed soon...”)

I couldn’t have done it but I didn’t go for a night out until my twins were 18 months old so I’m weird! If it’s not far from home and you’ve left him before I don’t see why not!

@Aprilshowersnowastorm @SmellMyBeads haha!! Thank you! I guess I just felt a little guilty - it’s good to know other mums have also had at least a bit of social life

@Chocolala I’m formula feeding, but I don’t think I’d risk more than one or two drinks after not having drank for so long anyhoo! Yeah, I just think I’d feel really disappointed in myself if I did say no! But that is a good point

@SinkGirl not weird! I think I would not want to go out even more if I had twins, I’d have a whole other LO to worry about! Yeah when I have left him I haven’t particularly enjoyed it though haha! Although it is easier when he’s with DP how did you find it when you did first go out?

It didn’t help that one of them has some health issues and my DH wasn’t particularly confident dealing with problems when they came up so I really would have struggled - by the time I went out they were sleeping better and my DH was much more confident so it was fine and I could enjoy myself :)

Go, enjoy, and if you feel it is too much too soon, no one is going to comment if you leave early. I'm sure your colleagues will be pleased to see you and it will probably help to ease you back into work when the time comes.

Absolutely go! I went to a colleague's leaving night when DC2 was a month old. Was good to get out and have a few drinks (FF so DH took care of the night feed and I dealt with the morning)

Thanks everyone!! I’ve decided to go 😊 I feel I should have mentioned I was also a bit worried about being judged by some of my older colleagues, I’m 23 so considered young by a few of them! I didn’t want to be seen as irresponsible, naive etc...

But anyways I’m going to try and have a good night! Finding something to wear was another battle in itself haha! Decided to just rock the Mum tum

How did it go op?

It was a really good night @Aprilshowersnowastorm thank you! Glad I went I had around 4/5 drinks and suprisingly wasn’t too paralytic! DP picked me up around 11pm. Had a bit of a fuzzy head this morning though!

Imo it makes for a more chilled out dm full stop knowing you aren't chained to your baby!! (in the nicest way!!)
You know your dc is fine and you can stil be you not just a dm!!
Well done!!