i can`t get over what happenned to my baby

[morethanamum]

yesterday i was at a friends house which has stairs{i dont, i live in a flat}
my baby was playing with other kids beautifully under the stairs,i looked away for 4 seconds and i heard her screaming,she abviously fill over i dont know how many stairs,she was crying,alot,then she stopped breathing for seconds as if she passed away,i screamed[what should i do,what should i do to her?] friends said to breath in her nose so shell breath again
i did,and she started crying again until she fell a sleep.
i went home,called my mum,a&e,my husband{whos a nurse} and the gp,they all said as long as shes fine now- she is-theres nothing to worry about.she only was crying very hard and was in shock,they also said it happens when kids are too upset. but i havent seen it happen to any one before.
i cant stop crying,i cant shake the thought that she might have gone,im dying out of guilt. they all say you should just thank god shs ok now,don`t over react.
am i over reacting?

you're probably in shock. thankfully she is ok. it really wasn't your fault

It was frightening and it all happened yesterday which is pretty recent. I'm sure the feelings will pass. Much sympathy.

Poor you - that must have been very frightening. It does happen, my youngest was frightened by a loud drilling noise when he was about 5 months old, he screamed and as I picked him up to comfort him he passed out in my arms. It was only a few seconds but it is very scarey.

How is she today?

Poor you. I am sure she is fine, but why not pop to A&E just in case she hit her head and is a bit concussed - it will put your mind at rest.

It was a huge shock and you're not over reacting, must have been very scary. You must try to drop the guilt thing though, it wasn't your fault. There will be lots more accidents and bumps and bruises (hopefully nothing as dramatic as this) - but you can't watch every second and these things will happen.

You sound a bit traumatised, which is understandable, but hopefully you'll start to put it behind you, she's fine, nothing bad happened and you will get past this.

Poor you, what a horrendous shock.

It sounds a bit like reflex anoxic seizure - children sometimes when they're shocked hold their breath (not always deliberately). They pass out and then the automatic system kicks in and makes them breathe. Its not supposed to be harmful and they grow out of it, but it sounds like a one off anyway. Looks much more frightening than it is.

But its probably the thought - I once just imagined DS getting an electric shock and since then I'm a little neurotic about plug sockets - the power of thought.

Hope you feel better soon

Perfectly understandable to keep thinking about it. This will haunt you for a few days, then gradually you'll get over it. It's shock. It's not your fault, but we are programmed to feel guily! Maybe talk it over with your mum, or other mums you know.

You are just shocked I think. It is certainly not your fault.
I turned away from ds2 the other day in the garden to pick up my cup of tea, about 2 seconds, and when I turned backhe had falled out of his carseat flat onto his face and was screaming.
It only takes seconds and chances are, even if you were watching for that second, there would have been no way you could have got there quickly enough to catch her.
Don't feel guilty about it.
Ds1 fell from the top of the stairs to the bottom when he was just at beginning to walk. He was at the bottom and shot up there and fell back down in about 15 seconds!
This may sound awful, there will be more bumps and bruises yet.

I once knew a baby who could stop herself breathing when she got in a tantrum - very scary the first time I saw it, actually my nephew did the same thing for a while.

If I were you I would take her to the doctors or A&E just to put your mind at rest. Please don;t blame yourself, its just one of those things that can happend, you are not at fault, you can;t keep your eye on them 24/7

oh morethan what an awful shock for you. As others have said your reaction is perfectly understandable, it is NOT your fault.

this happened to DD1 when she was about 1.5 yo. she fell off our bed which was very high, onto a tiled floor.she passed out and i thought she was dead, i passed out from the shock. DP was there. Anyway to cut a long story short, ambulance ride included, all that had happened was what kayjayel says - she got a shock from falling and cut out for a minute. The docs said it's common in kids under 2 yo. She did it again a few months later, after tripping and falling over. This time i kept calm, laid her on a table and she soon came round and was perfectly ok. You cant always be there to prevent an accident, dont beat yourself up.

that's very scarey - my dd1 also had several episodes of not breathing. It is very scarey when that happens!

Oh the guilt is terrible isn't it? I trod on the cat whilst walking down the stairs with DS2 in my arms (6 months old) and flung my arms out to right myself and ended up throwing him down the stairs . He also seemed to stop breathing, had blood coming out of his nose, the works. He came round very quickly, started screaming but we still went to hospital in an ambulance and he was kept in overnight - he was totally and utterly fine, just had a very small bruise on his forehead.

Even writing it all down makes me feel guilty all over again. BUT these things happen, it's horrible and scary but a complete accident - you're not over-reacting, it's perfectly natural to feel that way but you really need to stop thinking about the 'what-ifs' as you are only torturing yourself.

(((((HUGS))))))

That sounds frightening. I hope all is okay now.

My dd used to hold her breath until she passed out regularly. She only ever did it if she was really upset or frustrated about something and would quite literally go blue before passing out.

As soon as they become unconscious, they start breathing again (because you can't still be cross/upset/shocked when you are unconscious!)

I'm glad she's ok and please don't feel guilty. These things happen al the time.

My dd is now 11 and still gets cross about things but now she just slams doors

poor you - this happened to me, DD was about 9m and she fell over and hit her head (not very hard at all) she was sitting in between daddy's legs, he picked her up and we both said, awww look how she is crying (thinking poor wee lass - how sweet) she then burrowed head into DPs arms and we thought awww, i went to take her from Daddy and she wasnt breathing!!! My screaming her name brought her round, hubby was on phone to ambulance by this time and i just said, its ok, shes fine, took her to local clinic just for check but knew she was fine. Still scared me though. They do do this sometimes, they cry so hard they cant get enough oxygen in and pass out. This is so common and they WILL breath because the brain has a reflex gasp action that triggers the breathing again, so im told

Mrs W how awful for you.

DD1 didn;t stop breathing morethanamum but just to let you that accidents happen, I knocked ovre a tripp trapp flat pack onto her head when she was about 5m old, I too was completely hysterical and DH had to come home from work and meet me at the hospital - she was fine, I think it was more me than needed help! Really these things happen and as long as you don;t do them on purpose no one will think abd of you at all

I am the child that held her breath and scared the bejesus out of everyone around me. It stopped when I was around 6 years old

I actually remember the last time I did it, I hurt myself and just kept breathing in, no control over it, and my Mum was sat on the sofa with a friend and the friend was looking really frightened and my Mum is just saying "Fizzy, breathe, breathe" and I didn't. Fainted and came round after short time. Some children can do it on purpose others when in shock.

It is incredibly frightening and Karma happens because my eldest son did it for a while too.

It must have been awful for you, but we all turn our back for a second. No I don't think you are over-reacting, I think we are made to think the worst so that we take great care of our babies. It will fade and become anecdotal and one to tell the Grandkids

Oh it is horrible. I remember when my DS choked on his own spittle - he went blue. I was just holding him wondering WTF to do - and I am a nurse FFS. In the end I put him over my knee and wacked his back and he was fine again. Horrible feeling at the time but focus on the fact that she is fine now.

I think kayjelel is bang on the money with 'reflex anoxic seizure'. My dd gets this - it is frightening the first time it happens, but it is harmless

oh thank you thank you thank you all of you. i do love you all!!!!
though reading similar insidents brings those moments back!
shes fine now.as naughty as before. i guess it would have made it easier if i just heard about once before. i was over-protective of her today. i felt that,but couldnt help it.
i guess im the one whos not ok after all.
i vomited my dinner yesterday and i feel feverish today.
itll pass eventually.your stories gave me some confidence that she wasnt going to die just by falling.
my faith now is below zero.