Is there anything I can do to help my children like eachother a bit more?

[truebluebaby]

18m age gap, DS is 15m, DD is a few months off 3. They both pretty much ignore eachother! There's the usual scuffles over toys but I find it more sad that they just have no affection for eachother at all. They don't want to kiss eachother goodnight, rarely cuddle, today I was dancing with dd in the kitchen and ds wanted to join in and I asked her to hold his hand and she point blank refused. We get a lot of incidents like this. He's now quite hostile toward her!

They will grow out of this right? Am I doing something wrong?

We’re 7 months or so behind you but things are similar here. Older child is suspicious of (and slightly jealous) younger child. Younger child chases him and grabs his toys. However on rare occasions older child holds youngers hand or offers him food or a toy. I’ll take what I can get!

Interesting to know I shouldn’t expect much to change on that front in the next 7 months.

It's nothing you've done. It just the way things are. The older child is often jealous and resentful of the little one. The little one sees the older one doing interesting things, games he can't understand, places he can't reach, and tries to get attention by messing up the game, running off with toys and generally making a nuisance of himself. Hopefully it'll get better as they get older.

However on rare occasions older child holds youngers hand or offers him food or a toy. I’ll take what I can get

Yes there are a few glimpses of affection which I make a ridiculous big deal out of, actually just this morning my toddler banged her head on the stairgate and was crying and the baby went and grabbed her comforter and dummy to give to her, so they don't hate eachother really.

It's just as @Singlenotsingle says, they're just in different wavelengths at the moment. I just keep hearing of all my friend's toddler/baby siblings that adore eachother!

We are a year or so agead of you with same gap and they've just started playing with each other properly and loving each other. It's beyond cute. But my eldest used to regularly suggest putting the younger one in the bin.



Thanks @Fredkites , I guess I'll just have to be patient.

There's 2 years between my two and they're 5 and 3 now. I'd say it's only really been the last year that they enjoy playing together and spending time together. Before that they didn't really bother much with one another and then they went through a fighting over everything stage. Now they're best mates.

Not helpful but...

In a couple of years you will miss the days they were happy ignoring each other!

You will soon experience the joy of...

'He's looking at me'

'She's breathing too loudly'

Etc etc

Mine are a few months older but same difference, they are starting to play together more and be more affectionate. Im hoping things will continue to improve!

The little one just loves winding the older one up tho. He loves to 'hug' her, where he grabs her from behind and won't let go, she hates it and screams which just makes him do it all the more!