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I'm finding it hard being a mum to my 10month old

5 replies

GEmum123 · 06/09/2018 13:39

I absolutely love and adore my 10month old girl, but at the minute she is pushing me to my absolutely limits. After I gave birth i went straight back to uni to finish my final year and now I am finished I have to step up and be a proper mum. I feel that we don't have the bond I thought we would and I'm really struggling with day to day things and being motivated to do things with her! She is extremely clingy and cries all the time and her sleep pattern isn't great throughout the night. My pattern has his own business and works a lot and I feel like I'm nagging when he comes home and I ask him to do chores that I haven't been able to do. Luke I said before I absolutely love my baby girl but I feel like I have failed her by going back to uni but at the time I felt this was the best thing to do for our future but now I feel like it was the worst possible thing I could have done! Has anyone else been in a similar position and has it got better?? I'm just so down about the whole situation and don't feel in anyway a good parent or even partner at the moment!

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arbrighton · 06/09/2018 13:50

The 'clinginess' is probably just a phase of separation anxiety and 8-10 mo is a typical time for a sleep regression with the associated crap sleep.

Be realistic with chores and perhaps lower standards for a while and gradually build back up (that's what I tell myself I'm doing 14 mo in anyway)

FTMF30 · 06/09/2018 19:58

I hear this stage is the hardest. It'll get easier as she gets older but she is so dependant on you and it's draining. I feel the same as I currently have a 2month old and its draining the life out of me. My baby is also super clingy (think he has silent reflux or is a high needs baby)

I also can be a bit of a dragon when DH gets home but I think the key to this is compassion and understanding.Try to self reflect and, although you've had the baby although, remember he's been hard at work. Don't get me wrong, be sure to vocalise how flipping hard it is having a baby all day. But try to shy away from aggressive confrontation.

In regards to choosing to to uni, I think that was a sensible choice you made and it will pay off in the long run, you just have to hang in there and these tough days will seem like a distant memory. My friend also had a newborn in her final uni days She is now on her second child who has a very happy 5yo for a big brother.

GEmum123 · 06/09/2018 20:16

Thank you both of you for the comments and advice, I think at the minute it's just a bit of a rough time and I just really hope it gets betterSmile I just really needed some reassurance that I'm not on my own

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Cleo2628 · 06/09/2018 20:20

I’m also struggling with a 10mo as well. Feel free to message me!! I try and get out & about with her as much as I can, even if it’s just rubbing erronds. Much easier than trying to entertain her in the house! I also try to go to baby groups. There’s some free ones in the children’s centres or some that are £2. We also do one more expensive one. Also going to try and take her swimming once a week! All that stuff helps her sleep because she’s tired out. If I am stuck at home though there’s loads of ideas on Pinterest for baby activities to do at home :) we did a fun one with jelly today!!

Cleo2628 · 06/09/2018 20:21

Running erronds not rubbing!!!! Blush hahaha

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