Struggling to connect with a 2.5year old

[whenitsover]

So not sure if this is a phase / me / her. Dd is very active and struggles to listen. I try to give her as few commands as possible and let her play by herself, do what she wants (obvs within safe limits etc). However she struggles to listen, doesn’t respond when I ask very simple questions and is sometimes a pain in the a$$. I do try to set up nice games and activities like painting, drawing, toys set out, singing etc but she doesn’t engage and wanders off to do her own thing, but will inevitably come back to me to help her with her toy / game / whatever when I’m doing something. I also have a 8 month old so I can’t just stop to play with the toddler if baby needs feeding / attention etc so that’s why I try to set her up with things to do while I’m busy. Just can’t seem to get things right and feel like I’m fire fighting. Is this normal? Any ideas on how to engage the toddler for longer periods ? It’s at the point where I feel I spend the majority of time managing her and not with the baby, and I feel that’s an unfair balance.

Sounds relatively normal. I often have to get my dd (2yr 5months) to stop and look at me so she will listen, she's often wrapped up in her own activities or imaginative play. She will sit and do an activity for a bit but she decides when she's done and then moves on to something else. Mine will sit and watch a film sometimes (winney the pooh, miffy or similar) but obviously you don't always want to resort to telly.

Phew...glad I’m not doing Ahything glaringly wrong...⌨️I guess this will pass soon as she grows up. I hardly put the tv on....although I might start needing to. Any progs you can recommend that are educational ?

I think a good variety is best, she gets little things from most of the programmes. Twirlywoos are pretty harmless, simple concepts in each episode. She sometimes likes LittleBabyBum, it's got shapes, nursery rhymes and counting (although I find it a bit irritating). She also likes Noddy (toy detective), Puffin Rock , Peppa Pig and Ben and Holly although I couldn't tell you if they're educational she engages with the stories. We often put the telly on to gain an extra hour in bed in the mornings.