Feel like the worst Mum in the world.

[Butterflyrosebud]

I know this sounds ridiculous but I really struggle with Mum guilt in general (no one tells you about this before you have kids)

Then this morning I was cutting my beautiful 7 week old baby’s fingernails, they grow so fast and I don’t want to have her scratch mitts on all the time.

As I was cutting I accidentally got a bit of skin on the top of her finger, it bled a tiny bit. She did a cry I’ve never heard before. It was so awful I started crying too. I managed to calm her down fairly quickly with a cuddle and some milk but I feel horrendous because it was my fault. Seeing her little face so upset broke my heart. How I will cope with her injections I don’t know.

I feel guilty all the time for everything, even leaving the room. I feel like I’m always doing something wrong. Does this get better?

Aww you poor thing-I remember doing the same thing and feeling the same way.But it does get better,and you aren’t a bad mum,if you were you wouldn’t care about hurting her finger.

Absolutely everyone does this at some point - it's a rite of passage! Their little cries are heartbreaking at that age but you really won't have hurt her much. The fact that you're feeling guilty shows what an amazing and loving mum you are.

Poor you, that sounds horrid. I used to gently nibble my babies' nails to keep them short enough (sorry if gross TMI). It was easy to do while BF, so not intrusive, iyswim

I was going to say nibble their nails. Your mouth is much more sensitive and the baby probably won’t even realise what’s happening.
My mum sliced into my toe when I was much the same age and never cut my nails again (dad did). Honestly though I haven’t developed a phobia about nails and obviously don’t remember it.

@Butterflyrosebud

Please don't beat yourself up about it, it was an accident that happened when you were taking good care of your baby, and she'll have loved her Mummy cuddle and milk afterwards, she will be feeling much better now, Mummy cuddles are just the best and fix most things.

It sounds like you're doing a grand job with your baby, but make sure that you are taking good care of yourself too, having a baby is lîfe changing, you will have a lot of hormones and adjusting going on just now, you may have heard of the baby blues, these are quite normal, but if the they go on for a wee while then it may be PND.

Be kind to yourself, and if you feel you need to talk to someone, like your Health Visitor, then please do so. In fact, I'd really encourage you to speak to someone about how you're feeling.

Things will get easier, but it's ok not to feel ok, and it's ok to ask for help. I heard a saying once that it takes a village to raise a baby, it's not all meant to fall on Mummy, you don't have to have the reigns all the time.

Take good care OP

Good tips about nibbling the nails, you can also buy baby nail files

Thank you so much everyone for your lovely kind responses.

It was just the cry that got me. My husband does take over when he gets home but as soon as she starts crying I can’t help but jump in. I’ve got a hen do this weekend and will be away for the whole day... don’t know how I will cope!

I’ve heard a lot about PND and I think I’ve been lucky so far. I understand why the health visitors and doctors are always checking. My little girl only wakes up 1/2 times a night now so I am very fortunate.
Although the days can be challenging as she needs a lot of attention/ cuddles. Then trips out can be difficult as she’s not too keen on the car seat- another thing I feel super guilty about!

Don't beat yourself up over it lovely it's so easily done! I remember when I was buttoning up DS babygrow, I accidentally pinched his skin as I clipped the buttons together! I hated myself for ages kept giving him kisses and cuddles! Don't worry! She will be fine x

Nope the mother guilt never really goes away but it does get better as you learn to deal with it differently.
I cut dc 1 finger when she was tiny and cutting her nail. My dh took over nail cutting after that. I've never cut my 8 year old or 1 year olds nails . Nail cutting on babies is just to much for me

We all have moments of guilt but it was just an accident and your wee one won't remember anything :)

I have caught dds neck with a bib, and Dh accidentally bopped her in the face at 3 months with a hard rattle (attached to her soft toy and it just span round and hit her right in the face). She was so upset and I was so annoyed at him but 2 mins later she was happily gurgling away again after a cuddle.

As they get a bit bigger its not as bad. I still feel guilt but mine is toddler aged now and the bumps come thick and fast. We have clashed heads etc regularly. The guilt just moved to my hatred of mother toddler groups and socialising now ;)

I had this with my now 5 week old dd, she was in hospital with sepsis after she was born so had to have a cannula put in, catheter and bloods taken lots of times at just 2 days old. When she cried she had proper tears and it broke my heart, I think I probably cried more in that week than she did! But a lovely nurse used some sugar and water solution and let her suck it off her finger and she was happy as Larry! And obviously some mammy cuddles after and she was fine

You can just peel them off!! Still soft enough.
Just read about a poor baby who had his penis cut off during a circumcision.
Your baby got off lightly!

I remember doing the same to DD1 and in fact posting on mn about it! Sometimes these things happen. DH once pinched her tummy in the high chair fastenings and he was really upset too. She's 4 now and doesn't seem to have been affected by it!

God I did this and it was like a scene from a horror movie there was blood everywhere.

I didn't cut their nails again until they were about 7, it was DHs job.

I still feel guilty about doing that to my dd, and she'll be 30 soon! It's hard when they're tiny, you tend to blame yourself for everything. Accidents happen, and although it's hard, you have to learn to forgive yourself

Oh OP, I feel you. Been there, done that, got the t shirt! I felt absolutely horrendous, I cried longer than DD did. Her Dad also did the same, so now we file them! Much less distressing!

Keep your chin up, you’re doing great mama!

Those early weeks are so stressful and tough! My little one is only 7 months old now but I remember clearly how difficult it was. It does get better.

Thank you. xx

We’ve done some singing and dancing this afternoon, she’s been all smiley and has now fallen asleep on me so I don’t think she’s in any pain with it.

Yea I did that to ds3 I felt terrible too. He’s a well adjusted 16 year old now with no memory of the event.

@Butterflyrosebud I'm pleased to hear you're keeping so well I always like to mention, just in case - Thank you for being so receptive and not taking offence.

It sounds like you've got alot of support from your DH and are getting more sleep than most at 7 weeks, so that's grand.

Have a lovely time at the Hen do!

I think I know the cry you mean, it's not nice. The only consolation is that their moods change so quickly.