30 min naps for 12 wk old...did it change for you later?!

[threetwoonezero]

Aaah I am tearing my hair out to know what to do here, my DD is taking such short naps, and I dont know whether to plug her with a dummy to make her go longer which sometimes works but I dont want her dependent on the dummy, or to go with the 30 min naps but I've read that they are not really proper restorative naps...what to do? Anyone else got a napper on their hands, and did it get better for you and when, and any tips on how to make them go for longer?!

My 12 week old is the same. Takes 3x 20ish minute naps a day. He sleeps better at night but wakes regularly for feeding (but goes back to sleep, until about 5am)

My DD took 30-minute naps until she was 6 months old, they then extended to 90 mins each. She's now 10 months and has 1hr 15 mins in the morning and about the same in the afternoon.

Got slightly better after a year. Not much though and not always.

30-45 minutes is a sleep cycle, they normally wake up after this as they don’t know how to transition into the next cycle of sleep.
Eventually they do learn, my son learned about 4.5 months, was great after the sleep regression at 4 months.

i really cant remember when it changed, sorry (he's 5 1/2 now!), but it will. And I really don't think i did anything to help. I had no idea how much babies have to learn about sleep...how to get to sleep, stay asleep etc. It takes time and is so frustrating when you've only just got them down and they wake again and still seem tired. But try to just roll with it and gradually it will improve. My little one napped until aged 3 1/2 in the end...lovely, long naps too! You'll get there, you're at a tough stage.

Yes she sometimes screams going for naps but not crying ? Basically screaming
I have a 5 year old who slept through from 4 months old and slept for hours during the day. I just thought that's what they do until this little miss came along!
She is currently going through the regression and what's to lie on me all night we're previously she would go down at 7pm and not wake till 4 for a bottle . I didn't mind the cat naps so much then!
Well I've discovered pink gin through all of this so that's something I suppose?

Nice to know I'mnot alone...amazing how every child brings its own special problem...today we clocked 2 naps of 15 mins, and 2 at 40 mins...trying to ignore the sites that say how bad it is for babies that dont sleep for 90 min cycles, and for at least 4 hours total!

Yes it did change for me, ds used to take 30-45minute catnaps. He then changed to two 1 hour naps a day and then eventually one 2-3 hour nap a day. I’ll never forget the first time he slept more than 45 minutes, I didn’t know what to do with myself it was bliss.

He was 6.5 months when his naps improves if that helps

improved *

Think the hour naps gradually changed to 1.5 hour too. It gets so much better

@threetwoonezero strange user name btw

Yes- ignore the sites, your baby is an individual, not a robot that follows what a baby should do.

I went through quite a long stage of baby only getting about 9 hours of sleep over 24 hours in total and was told (on here) that recommended times for that age were 15 hours (on nhs site) I did mention that other sites said 12 hours, but I was wrong and must go by NHS guidelines. Also, lack of sleep affects brain development.

Made me feel like crap as I just couldn't get baby to sleep- he wanted to stay awake

Your baby will get there, they all do. Mine has just had a really good week of night time sleep for the first time in ages, I know it won't last forever, I'm waiting for the 9 month sleep regression. But- he can do it. So that's the main thing.

Thanks all! Feeling so much better about this now, feeling like I have a 'normal' child rather than a text book child, some of these authors of the impossible perfect routines should be ashamed of themselves, there should be a chapter in the book for babies that will be an exception to their rules rather than suggesting that mothers arent following the rules properly and thats why their babies dont sleep 'right'. She seems quite happy with her naps and at the end of the day thats important

Just one more question though, she is formula fed but I'm doing EASY and she's feeding then pretty much every 2.5 hours but any tips on what to do with that? She seems OK with it but I'm worried that she is drinking too often...

I consider my baby 'textbook' he fights sleep, goes through all the sleep regressions and keeps me awake at night!

Isn't that what babies do?

Your little one is still young, I would say she is feeding fine- can you feed to often?

I'm having the opposite problem with my 7 month old- 9 hours between milk feeds at 12pm today, he still didn't want it! He took it in the end

At 12 weeks DD would only sleep on me, in the car seat or carrier and only did really short naps. Couldn’t get her in the cot without screaming. Also a crap overnight sleeper. Worst of all worlds.

Started gradually putting her down for naps around 5 months and she now does longer naps (1.5 - 2hrs) in her cot with a little complaining. She’s almost 8 months.

You have the 4month regression coming up so honestly don’t worry about it at this stage. Feeding every 2.5 hrs also seems fine- she is still tiny.

The “sleep experts” have to tell you something’s wrong otherwise how can they sell you their “sleep solution”?

Keep persisting with giving her the opportunity for longer naps but don’t stress about it, she’s still very young and will get it eventually.

I'm by no means an expert, but white noise has helped us immensely. I reckon we get about 2 hours extra a night. Worth a try

Forgot to add, I also have a 12 week old.

She has about 3 or 4oz every 3 hours. You just have to do whatever works for your baby, they're all different.

I have 3mo twins. Bf. For the first 2mo I just bf, wriggled out from under them when they dropped off, and either popped them into their cocoons in the cot or parked them on the sofa. 3 or 4 weeks ago the nanny who will be minding them when I return to work in October started. I also had a visit from a sleep consultant (for want of a better word). I wanted to set up a routine that someone else could manage besides me.
Basically sleep consultant advised: all daytime naps in cot. Dim room. White noise. Swaddle. Into cot. Place dummy in mouth. Pat bum slowly. Withdraw once asleep. If they cry, turn from one side to the other, remove and replace dummy, tweak things for up to 30 seconds. If crying >30 sec then pick up and gently resettle while patting bum slowly , back into bed once calm but awake. Watch carefully for sleep cues to time naps but basically 45-90 min awake time, depending on the preceding sleep.
So twins are different of course! The boy likes the dummy and will accept a swaddle (which makes the dummy much easier to keep in place so yay). He is much more inclined to cry and flail his arms. Invariably wakes up crying at 40 to 45 min. The girl hates both dummy and swaddle but is calmer and can be reasoned with! She wakes up happy. Oddly enough they were born that way, boy screeching and girl serene.
They basically wake 1 hour, take 5 to (God help us) 30 min to get to sleep, sleep 45 min and repeat. Bf about every 2.5 hours but I don't schedule that. Earlier in the day they ae easy enough. Bedtime is hard but better than the 4hrs of howly duetting we had before. Every day one or other will link two sleep cycles by magic. Nothing I can seem to do about that. It's much more likely to be the girl as when the boy wakes up, he wrestles with the swaddle, loses the dummy and is then thoroughly awake. (He is very much helped to get to sleep by his props though, so that's okay.)
I start the day with both babies in unison but invariably and quickly end up with them on a different timing.
What else can I say? The sleep consultant mentioned a 'wake to sleep' technique to extend short naps. Basically you v gently disturb the baby a short time before the predicted wake up in the hope that it will induce them to commence another sleep cycle. I haven't tried it yet.
At the moment it is very much looking as if I am going to have to employ a second helper which will make it barely worth my while to work.
We'll see what happens over the next 6 weeks.

The most important thing I’ve learned about parenting (my son is almost two so I’m far from an expert, though I do feel like a grizzled veteran some days!) is that everything changes. If you’re going through a tough patch with sleep or food or whatever - it won’t last. Sadly, that also means that the bits that seem to be working are often temporary too!

Every 2.5 hours feeding is fine if that’s what baby wants.

I didn’t read any books or follow any schedules. I just watched DS really closely to learn his sleep cues, then put him to sleep when he needed it (just before he got overtired). When he was little he rarely slept long in his cot during the day, so I decided just to hold him for his naps. I’m so glad I did - I remember it so fondly now and it was such a lovely hour-long break for me. He’s a decent sleeper now but we cosleep at the moment (and I love that too).

Also: use a dummy! Why not? It gives baby comfort and helps protect against SIDS. I frigging love dummies!

Thanks all I wasnt getting alerts for these updates on my email, but its really nice to read them all. Another week on and she's done a few longer naps of her own accord which is encouraging, one of an hour and then one of 1.5 hours after being taken out in the car seat (know I shouldnt make a habit of that one). So, as you say everything changes, both the good and the bad!

@Annalogy, yes white noise does seem to be helping.
@villainousbroodmare, wow twins massive respect for that!

Yes - but it took until 8 months, then she could nap for 60-120 mins

Update at 5 months...we are getting a regular 1.5 hour nap whoopee! So anyone reading this with a 3 month old who felt the same way as I did then I hope this news helps