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Parenting

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Original poster

Drinking while taking care of kids ...

39 replies

NotQuiteCockney · 03/06/2007 18:24

If I have any alcohol while in charge of my children (I'm talking a single unit or less) I find my patience completely evaporates. I want them to be good now, I don't want any back talk, and oh, they just annoy me so much. Particularly if we're at home.

(Obviously, as a result, I tend to avoid drinking while the kids are underfoot.)

Does anyone else have this reaction? It would be nice to be able to have a beer with dinner, and not turn into a horrible shouty person. I don't become like this with everyone when drunk, it really is just my kids ...

OP posts:

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 03/06/2007 18:51

I'm not about to tell anyone else they should be drinking around their kids, god knows. I'm sure teetotal is better than what I (and a lot of other people) grew up with.

DH and I often like to share a stubby of Stella. So 250ml? 330ml of beer between both of us. We really are pathetic lightweights, in a strictly metaphorical sense of course.

OP posts:

bozza · 03/06/2007 18:52

Hmm. I keep thinking that DS will need less sleep but it is not happening. He is 6 and struggles with much less than his regulation 11.5 hours a night. He can manage on 11 hours on the odd night, but less than that, or even that on a consistent basis and he is rubbish. DD now needs at least that because we are avoiding naps or she keeps DS awake.

filthymindedvixen · 03/06/2007 18:52

Think you just have to accept that for a finite period, you're not going to be enjoying a sundowner. And you'll feel better tomorrow when they wake you at 5.30am anyhow. Especially if you've had to get up twice in the night to replenish water cups/find teddy/chase away the monstrous tiger under the bed/clean up vomit.

And when yours are almost 7 and almost 10, you'll be gutted (like I am) at the fact that they a) refuse to bath
b) would rather you doin't read them a story
c)would rather play Nintendo than interact with any kind of book at all

When i think about this, that's when I reach for the Pinot grigio....

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SoccerMum76 · 03/06/2007 18:52

Frannyandzoe, are you saying parents should not drink around their children at all?

FrannyandZooey · 03/06/2007 19:00

SoccerMum, no, you need to read my posts again. I don't think it's good for children to see their parents getting drunk, though.

Mine won't be seeing me drinking in front of them because I don't drink, and I'm not about to start.

Wotz · 03/06/2007 19:04

It depends on what age the children are I think and how responsible they are.

I never drink if I am in charge of others dcs, but I do in moderation of my own.

If my DH is away, I don't until they are in bed.

dd2 fell on landing geting ready for bed and I have to drive her to A&E. I had not had a drink, so I could drive.

Hulababy · 03/06/2007 19:07

DD seems me and DH, plus family and friends drink, but they don't see us drunk. I don't really get drunk nowadays anyway - a bit tipsy maybe, but I can no longer drink enough to get drunk. For us it is just part of our normal life and out social life too, so I hope DD is seeing a healthy attitude to alcohol.

You have to do what works best for you. I agree getting drunk in front of children is never a good idea, but having a drink is not generally bad.

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 03/06/2007 19:19

I don't drive, so drinking isn't an issue there. I really am talking about, at most, about a unit of alcohol. Not more than that. I really don't drink much at all, so I find that a small amount is quite relaxing enough.

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unknownrebelbang · 03/06/2007 19:23

I'd save it then until after the children are in bed.

I'm the opposite, I do find a glass of wine quite relaxing, and can remember the first time I really noticed iykwim.

Like most people I don't have a problem with children seeing grownups having some alcohol, within reason, but other people's personal experiences will make them have a different view.

LucyJones · 03/06/2007 19:26

I agree with everything Hulababy says.
I usually have a drink at 6pm just before the kids go to bed. Dh takes them though so it's not a problem.
3 year old ds does say 'Mummy wine?' when we go for lunch - usually when he's asking for juice.

Wolfgirl · 03/06/2007 19:38

No not me, quite the opposite, full of energy, can play and dance, but do suffer later oh, not the kids, me that is. ha

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 03/06/2007 19:45

I don't get a hangover if I just have one or two units, by the way, particularly if I'm entirely sober by bedtime, so I get a good night's sleep.

A hangover with children underfoot is a horrible horrible idea.

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Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 10/06/2007 20:19

Ok, I had a trial run at this, this afternoon. We spent all afternoon at a very relaxed kids' party in the park. I had a few glasses of wine - maybe three total? Over four + hours. And it was fine. Nice, even.

Until, of course, I had to try to get them home in a timely manner at the end. Well, it wasn't dreadful, I didn't shout, I realised the reason for my lack of patience was the booze, but still ...

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mylittlefreya · 10/06/2007 20:51

I only have a drink once the baby is in bed. And it's only the one. I have never really drunk more, and I will be happy to have that single drink in front of her when she is bigger.

DP drinks a bit more, but he is able to get up with the baby if necessary, and really not a lot of behavioural change.

I agree - I would not want her to see changes in our behaviour. That is what frightened me growing up.

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