Mums with 3 kids

[Flowers54]

Ive had 3 children close together, the youngest is 1. Its what DH and I wanted..when i got pregnant with DC3 he changed jobs and worked away for 1 week which changed to 2 weeks. Then it escalated to his job being national, sometimes only at home for 1 afternoon or evening a week and is exhausted. I work part time now, pre children i was so career focused but thats taken the back burner. Financially we're comfortable as we have 2 incomes but thats about as far as it goes. Our relationship has gotton to a place i never thoight it would. We are so distant and have massively drifted apart. Admittedly i am starting to resent him, he loves his job, comes and goes as he pleases. Doesnt have any stress with the children. I thought i would love working PT but am finding being at home harder than work. The cooking, shopping, cleaning, entertaining the kids is relentless. I feel awful saying it but i was actually dreading spending the day with them today. If I want to do anything alone I have to book it in advance as he has to book it off work and makes me feel like its a massive inconvenience. Ive tried telling him how much his job is affecting us but he just doesnt see it.
Has anyone got through DH working away or find a way to make it work. I actually feel that low in my mood I'm starting to think Id rather be on my own.

I was in a similar situation OP and know how hard it is. My dh took a job 150 miles away as he couldn't find a job locally. He was away from 5am Monday morning until 9pm Friday night. We also have 3 kids and at the time our youngest was only 11 months.

He really missed the kids and it was hard for him, the job is very demanding. I never got a break and although he wasn't doing it out of choice, I resented him for it , as, like you said, he could come and go as he pleased, he could suit himself every evening and was waited on hand and foot by his Mum (that's where he stayed). We finally ended the situation a few months ago when we moved closer to his work. I'm not sure we would've survived much longer and it's definitely not something we could have sustained long term. It puts an incredible strain on everybody.

Sorry, I'm probably not much help. Just wanted to give my 2p worth!

Could you afford an extra day a week childcare, for a day you don't work? To give you some downtime: go to the cinema, get your nails done, jog - whatever floats your boat. This may not solve everything, but it'll give you some breathing space and a good indication of where the biggest problem lies...

I have just started another thread 'craving space' I am a sahm with 3 dcs. My dh is around a bit more but with no extended family, I feel as if i'm struggling and crave alone time.