Social services

[Vickyglitz]

On Monday my partner and I had a row and he pushed me. We have a 6 week old. I stupidly called the police. There is no history of domestic violence. Police say social services will be notified (as is standard) but I am terrified that they will come around, not because of what they will find but because it will make my and my partner's already strained relationship worse. I need to obtain passports for my child which I can only do with his cooperation and consent. He has already threatened to not participate in making the passport and letting me leave on holiday with baby. He was really mad I called the police. Will social services notify me before they come? Will they necessarily speak to him? If they just turn up we will have another massive row.

I think if your partner pushed you and you are worried about his future reactions then you need to have some serious considerations about your relationship and how you are going to to keep your baby safe.

It is was the right thing to contact the police.

They wont turn up unless theres concern for little one

You weren't stupid to call the police, it was the right thing to do.

The pushing, and the withholding behaviour is abusive. It will probably get worse, not better.

Do you have somewhere to go?

Guys, I really need to know if they will call before turning up!

Ps: I am ok for social services to come just after I get the darn passport. How is them coming now going to be helpful - they can't make him sign the passport form!

Yes, they should do especially if they suspect DV.

They called to make an appointment from my experience.

You weren’t stupid to call the police. Having blazing rows that escalate to violence is not only abusive to you but also your children for being in that environment.

If in the UK he doesn’t need to sign the passport form. Do you have his passport number? You just put yours and his on the form and send it off.

You can get a passport for your child without his input, I promise you. My ex, who has PR, had no participation at all in my daughter's passport.

If he's pushing you about and you're this worried about his reaction to SS involvement, perhaps you need to have a think about whether your child is being brought up in a healthy environment. I left DD's father when she was 6 weeks old. It's fucking rough but sometimes it's just the right thing to do for your child and you need to pull up your big girl pants and get on with things.

It is not a UK passport. We definitely need his consent. When that's all done and dusted I will leave him. I've made up my mind. But I can't let anything jeopardize the passport right now. It's of paramount importance. If anyone knows how he can be forced to consent to the passport, that would help too.

How soon can you get him to sign the passport?

@danni0509 around end of September. I need 2 passports - one of his home country and one of mine. His home country one will be done by the middle of this month. My home country one by end of September.

Usually Children's services would phone before coming out initially. However legally they have to follow up and investigate any referral that they receive. This may include them wanting to visit you at home. They are not interested in you or your partner only your baby's welfare and wellbeing.

If you are worried about your partner's reaction over this, then.you need to leave him asap. Children's Services or Women's aid can help you do that if you are UK based.

You need to show that you are keeping your baby safe and putting their needs first if a social worker comes out to see you.

@London28 I believe they SS get notified but don't generally come and see every single case?

Vicky - years ago my best friends partner punched her when she had a newborn, police were involved & they notified SS who phoned her, had a chat over the phone but never went to her house.

Sad to say the situation never got any better, she stayed with him and her newborn is now a teenager SS have been involved a lot over the years due to DV.

Hope you find a way out. X

When children's services receive a referral into MASH they will talk to other professionals involved with family/child to see if they have any concerns. E.g. GP, Health Visitor, Nursery this will help determine if a home visit is needed or not.

Noted about the passport but I think you need to stay somewhere else until you get it sorted.

They will see whether the family have been flagged before I imagine to start with . If any other agencies have contacted them with concerns .

Are you trying to get two passports for your child for dual nationality? I would consider carefully if you really want hint to have a passport for his Dad’s country.