What to say about Santa / Father Christmas

[MangoApplePear]

Hi,

Ok I know it’s not yet August, so look away now if you can’t bear talking about Christmas yet!

I’m interested in what mumsnetters say to their kids about Santa / FC. Any mumsnetters on here who tell their kids it’s just pretend? I’d like to hear different approaches to this and not just the traditional western approach of telling kids Santa is real until they’re old enough to figure it out.

For some background, I’m not crazy about the whole Santa thing, but don’t want to be a mean mother, either! So very keen to hear different points of view on how this is handled.

I always said, "It's fun to pretend", about Father Christmas and talked about the stories surrounding the character. Nice to find traditional pics of Fr Christmas in green and even in brown. Then you're not lying but can enter into the spirit of the thing.

Unfortunately some other parents don't feel the same way so be warned (but take no notice).

Can't say that believing my Santa ever did me any harm

As long as you're confident they won't tell other kids it's pretend in the playground.

It never occurred to me to do it any different than my parents. Encourage belief and the magic for as long as the child wanted.

Like in my time there will always be kids who insist it's your mum and dad. Doesn't stop belief for the little ones and I would feel a bit sorry for the ones for whom he didn't exist and therefore he didn't visit.

DH and I put loads of effort into making Christmas fun for DC. It's not about spending tons of money but creating magic and doing daft fun stuff together. For instance, we have a lonely sad troll that lives at the bottom of the garden and gives out sweets occasionally and singing fairies who live behind a wall etc. Father Christmas comes down the chimney and eats a mince pie, drinks whiskey (or whatever) and takes a carrot for the reindeer.
They're only little for a short time.

Its magical and they love it (9&6) think they're starting to think it's nonsense - albeit that's the 6 YO - he's a bit clever lol 😆
But essentially we say a few gifts are from Santa the rest from us

I never told them he was real, but I never told them that he wasn't either. We would read stories that encompassed the ideas that the legend has been built on. Sang Good King Wenceslas looking at the words, we watch the Santa Claus every year (still do actually) we always donate to Christmas food bank appeal and prepare rucksacks for Emmaus and when they got their gifts it was never ever from Father Christmas and they never noticed.

DD1 found out in year 5 when we told her over the summer as there had been big discussions about it in school the year before and I wanted to control how she found out. The same year the DD2 who was 8 said 'I don't believe in FC' at which point DD1 said 'I didn't tell her' in a bit of a panic.

The funny thing is even after we told DD1 she still believed (I think secretly aged 22 she's still waiting for her Hogwarts letter) she's a bit of a dreamer.

Billybagpuss

Rebecca36

Both your posts sound like a balanced way to approach this

Mine still believe at 26, 23 and 20. No present from Santa unless a begging letter is written, them's the rules.

Mine asked very early onif he was real, I didn't want to lie so told me them some people believe and it was down to them what they believed.

Christmas can still be very magical and special even with non believers.