Mum of 3 with Bipolar

[jdow]

Hi...
I'm a 33 year old mum of three with 2 girls aged 7 and 2 and a son aged 1.

I have recently been diagnosed with Bipolar which I have suffered with for a while, made worse by the stress of having 3 children and 2 under 2.

I feel anxious when my husband leaves for anywhere as I feel I can't cope with my children - I get panic attacks and sweat profusely. I dread every day when I'm alone. I am overwhelmed with keeping 'house' and keeping my kids healthy and happy.

My eldest is deaf and I have extra challenges with her which add to my day making it more difficult (she can't hear instructions or doesn't know her own volume when I'm trying to get the babies to sleep etc. Not her fault!)

Having 2 under 2 is so hard - they're similar but want different things at different times and I can't be in 3 places at once. All this aggravates my bipolar symptoms and thus need to carry on but suffering from suicidal thoughts, depression, anxiety and sometimes highs where I cope fine. If only I could be on a high all the time. My medication also gives me horrendous drowsy feelings which make me want to sleep.

I don't know what advice I'm asking for really, I just need to know how I can convince myself I can cope with it all. I've asked my husband to drop a day off work but he's reluctant. I just feel I need help and have no one else who can. The babies are soon going to nursery twice a week for 3 hours which will give me some time to my self but otherwise I don't get any.

Has anyone got anything they can say about my situation????

Thanks.

My first question would be, are you sure it's Bipolar? Sounds more like BPD to me .. you have to keep on at the docs and mental health team to get anywhere. I swear mine hate me but hey sod it, it's my life!!

Medication is key if Bipolar, nothing sadder than watching someone with Bipolar cope unmedicated. If BPD it's all about living right, sleep (hard with kids, I get it), eating particularly snacks .. you'd be amazed how many times your mood is just because your sugar level has dropped and you need to eat something. Drink plenty of water, stay away from stimulants .. coke, coffee, usuals.

There's loads of books you can find if you just google ur disorder with pdf after it. I slowly get through DBT books and mood therapy. I can't point you in a few directions if you want.

Last thing ..... when you're in it .... the pit of despair, distract yourself with something, colouring, washing up, put on a song and bloody dance all the way through it, watch a comedy show .. anything!!! You just have to ride the wave, you'll even out.

P.S There's some good apps on phones too. I have a few I use and colouring .. I'm obsessed with colouring.

P.P.S ALWAYS take your meds but do insist on a med check every few months with a psychiatrist .. not the doctor. You just have to be tenacious

You can do it, we're stronger than we think x