16 mo son prefers dad

[Mcoy18]

Hi
My 16 month old son prefers dad and it's so painful to deal with. He won't let me hug or hold him when dad is around, he gets angry and pushes me away. He won't let me pick him up or feed him with dad around. It's so painful to deal with

It dad is not around we have a lovely time but soon as dad walks in he will barely look at me.

If we are all In public he won't let me near him. All about dad

Has anyone experienced this??

Thank you

Yes, for about a year with my DS when he was around that age. Found it incredibly difficult but luckily have older DD who gave me lots of cuddles. However she knew I was upset as although I tried not to show I was upset, I couldn’t always keep it in. DH Very sympathetic and supportive but said it was not right to make DS feel as if he had done anything wrong. DS is now 7. He and DH are so similar in terms of interests and the way their minds work. However, he also loves spending time with me and we do things together and I also have a special but different bond with him and he doesn’t show this kind of overt favouritism any more. So I would say hang in there. I have learnt that most things are a phase. As you have a lovely time when his dad is not there it will be fine.

Yup.

My 2.5 year old DS does this. It's horrible and I find it very embarrassing in front of people sometimes for eg in front of Dhs parents yesterday when I approached DS he started screaming no daddy daddy. Makes me feel like I must look like a bad mum

BUT we also now have days where I'm his 'best friend' not daddy.

Hoping it's a phase

Bide your time; all will be well.

Rejoice in the lovely relationship he is developing with your OH.Research says that boys who have lots of physical hugs, rough-and-tumbles with their Dads become better adjusted adults.

Thank you. I am hoping and know in my heart it's a phase. I do love the relationship he has with his dad . It's just hard being rejected all the time !!

Glad I'm not the only one! Am hoping it is a phase too. Feeling very frustrated which unfortunately I'm taking out on my oh too

Yes. My 2.6 year old is like this and has been on and off for about a year. I find it so hard to deal with. It’s not just you. Fingers crossed that (like everything else with babies/toddlers) it’s just a phase.

It's because he is so confident in the relationship he has with you, he needs constant reassurance from the one with his df. If you are his main carer this is normal!!

Readyfortheschoolhols - that actually makes me feel a bit better. Thank you. I hope it’s true!

My DD had a phase of doing this. We went abroad on holiday and the whole time she didn't allow me to change, dress, feed her etc. It was bliss I had such a relaxing holiday. Of course I missed the cuddles but honestly make the most of being able to hand him over to daddy. Now she asks me to do EVERYTHING even when daddy is sitting right next to me. Honestly don't worry about it, it's just a phase.

My now 2 year old was like this too, probably at around the same age for a few months. She wanted Daddy for everything except putting her to bed and if she felt unwell. We have a very close relationship but she’s still a Daddy’s girl. I can still tell she’s getting ill if she’s craving more affection from me.

My almost 2 year old is like this. It really upsets me however he's completely different when DH isn't there! I get so much attention. All I can suggest is tell yourself the phase will end & focus on 1:1 time

I really hope this phase ends soon!

Yes! My DS did this from as soon as I stopped breastfeeding at about 7 months. He was happy with me until he glimpsed DH then didn't want to know me. It passed, but can't remember how long it took. Maybe a year in our case. Then he preferred me, but now at age 10 he's quite even.

Yes, had this for around a year. It was very very difficult and embarrassing at times. I felt like a failure. It has passed now, thank goodness, although still prefers daddy at times and vice versa.

It is definitely a phase like most things. I also took comfort from the suggestion that he is so comfortable and confident in our bond that nothing would push me away.

We’ve had this. In our case it wasn’t a phase and was due to the fact that dad does the bulk of the childcare, as well as being more fun and a bit of a pushover. Although I find it a bit sad, as the grown up I see it as my job to get over it and do whatever I can to keep my bond with the child as strong as possible.