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Original poster

Help, I’m losing my mind

15 replies

WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 10:04

Right, so DS is almost 2. He’s a very funny, clever happy little boy generally and usually sleeps well etc. He’s dropped his final nap during th day because he was taking too long to go to sleep at night, but he seems fine with this and he’s still his usual self in the day. However as of late, has started with what I can only describe as blood curdling screams. I was expecting the terrible 2s but this is on another level. It can be tantrums when he doesn’t get his own way, if he doesn’t want to sleep (if he’s napped and doesn’t want to go to bed at normal time) if he’s overtired, if he wants daddy and he’s at work etc.

Last night DP woke him up banging around in the spare room Angry and from then on he just screamed. He calmed down and fell asleep on me about 5 times and every time I try to put him back to bed he just screamed again. I tried leaving him, I tried just cuddling him which was very sweaty cos it was about a million degrees last night, nothing worked and none of us have had any sleep. I’m currently sat in the car park writing this and I’m already late for work cos I just cannot face it right now.

I guess what I’m saying is I just don’t know how to cope with it. It’s horrendous, I’m waiting for the police or social services to knock on my door cos the neighbour thinks I’m murdering him or something (if you are my neighbour I’m very sorry Blush). Why is he doing it? What do I do?

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Original poster
WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 13:35

Hopeful bump

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imsconequeen · 09/07/2018 13:37

It sounds like he's overtired! Is he not a bit young to have no sleep during the day or have I misread? X

bellinisurge · 09/07/2018 13:39

Cut yourself a lot of slack. It's hot. Didn't pick up on whether he naps in the day. I'd suggest that but again, it's hot. It's tough in this weather at the best of times.

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Cbeebiessavesmyafternoon · 09/07/2018 13:42

Sounds like he's overtired. Can you shorten his nap?, keep the nap and have a later bedtime for a while so hopefully he settles more easily? He naps every other day? Is it teething?

Every child is different but does seem young to drop nap entirely and it being hot definitely doesn't help at all.

EstrellaDamn · 09/07/2018 13:48

I had a 2 hour afternoon nap yesterday because it was so bloody hot Grin Sounds like he's overtired but doesn't quite know if.

ILoveMyDressingGown · 09/07/2018 14:08

I'd reinstate the nap tbh. It sounds like he's overtired.
Re. the noise from your partner waking the toddler up, your partner should have been the one trying to get him back to sleep - it'd teach him to be more considerate in the future.

ShackUp · 09/07/2018 14:15

DS2 is getting his molars at the moment (he's 2) - could it be this?? Thanks

Stroller15 · 09/07/2018 14:28

My nearly two year old did that last night! Felt like a torture method being woken up with, what I can only describe as screeching, just as I fall asleep. I did see he is cutting his top molars so I hope and pray that's the cause and not the start of 'terrible two's'.

Original poster
WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 15:39

I tried a shorter nap, as he could easily go 2-3 hours a day, so tried gradually limiting it to 1.5 hours, then an hour etc and he was still the same at bed time, screaming etc.

I’d normally be able to put him down still awake and he would doze off on his own, same for nap time etc but if I even tried that now all he’ll would break lose. I literally have to wait until he’s so tired he falls asleep on me then put him down, and this has been working fine until last night when he woke up.

During the day he’s not screaming all day it does just seem like little toddler tantrums and are mostly over in a few mins are obviously exasperated by the heat at the moment, it’s just occasionally he does do this awful screaming out of no where. Bed time is definitely worse.

He doesnt appear to be teething as far as I can tell.

And DP did sit with him for a bit whilst I slept and we swapped.

Definitely was torture Sad

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bellinisurge · 09/07/2018 15:53

I'd say he was struggling with the heat and the light nights and being 2. If you think there is a development issue, speak to a gp or health visitor. You know your boy best.
Be kind to yourself. This weather is tough on all of us. And any neighbour with any sense will say "thank god, I'm not dealing with it, this time". As I and most parents do when I see a parent and a child having a meltdown.

TuckMyWin · 09/07/2018 16:19

I could have written your post word for word. We've been getting the middle of the night, screaming like a banshee thing too. And bedtime has been taking an hour or more for months now. Mine's almost 2 as well. We've also been unable to leave his room at bedtime until he's been asleep. Honestly, I think it's developmental. I would reinstate the nap, because I think that being overtired won't help and, in my experience at least, bedtime takes equally long no matter how much sleep he's had. I'd then try gradual retreat for bedtime. We've been slowly working our way out of the room for months now, and just in the last week have made it to just outside the door. It still took me 10 mins to calm him down last night when he woke up at 3am, but I'm starting to see him respond to being talked to calmly, and he will go back to bed and let me leave the room once he's calm. I don't think it's anything we've done, particularly, though, I think it's just his language skills are getting better so I can start to reason with him. Either way, you have my sympathies -it's bloody hard, isn't it?! His older brother wasn't like this- We had the tantrums in the day, but not at bedtime/nighttime!

Original poster
WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 19:38

So he’s had a nap today at my parents because he had no sleep last night, he’s tired enough for bed and has literally screamed in my face and smacked my glasses off my face repeatedly until DP came to take over because he wanted daddy and not mommy. He also screamed when my mom left him with my dad whilst she popped out today, any ideas of it could be separation anxiety or something? It’s just so out of the blue I don’t get it.

Finding it so so hard to remain calm Angry

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Original poster
WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 19:40

And thank you everyone that has replied so far.

Finding this parenting malarkey so difficult Sad

Worst thing is, he won’t even settle for DP for bed now either, I put him to bed every night normally. I think it’s cos DP has changed his hours at work so is never normally home at bed time and now he gets home just before his bed time he sees daddy’s home and wants to play.

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FinallyHere · 09/07/2018 19:58

gets home just before his bed time he sees daddy’s home and wants to play.

Home long is "daddy" home before DS's bedtime? If it's just a few minutes, could he delay for that time, just so you could get DS to bed. Or creep in soundlessly, just til the LO is safely in bed?

Original poster
WhyDoesHeDoThis · 09/07/2018 20:10

Usually about 30-45 mins but he was late tonight only got in as we were going up to bed! As predicted I am now trying to get him to bed 🙄

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