School party etiquette

[QueenOfMyWorld]

Is there one?
Ds starts school in Sept and it's got me thinking about birthday parties etc.It is usual for children to invite whoever they fancy or the whole class?

This is an interesting topic and I'm sure will bring out a lot of comments. I didn't realise there was an etiquette until I got caught out once.

I have always assumed that as I am merely the credit card to pay for the party, I allowed my DS to choose who to invite. After all he knows his friends more than me. However at his 10th birthday party ( he is 11 now) he didn't invite a particular child to his party. I was told in no uncertain terms (by child's family)that I was out of order for not inviting this child to the party. It was horrible. My DC was made to apologise to child for "upsetting " the child for the oversight.
There is no etiquette. My belief is its for the child to decide who comes to their party. It works both ways though. Your child might not get invited to all parties and it's for us parents to manage that expectation.

That seems fair enough I wouldn't want to pressure him into inviting everyone

In reception generally all the class or half the class (or fewer), unless the class is mainly boys (or girls for a dd) and they just play with boys (or girls) in which case acceptable to invite 'all the boys'.

Alternatively just invite whoever they like. The only thing that seems unacceptable is to just exclude a few (either of whole class or of just the boys). From yr1 onwards I just give them a limit (usually 10) and let them choose. I would remind them if they left out a good friend.