How to teach wiping bottom

[eggandspoonrace]

DS, 4, has been potty trained for a year but I've always wiped his bottom after a poo. How do you teach them to do it themselves as he starts school soon and I want him to be prepared?

I just explained what I was doing as I was wiping. I'd show them how to get and fold the tissue, then say, "Can you feel where I've put it? Can you feel how much I'm pressing on?" and then show them the tissue afterwards. I'd do that for each wipe until it was clean and explain how I knew to stop. I did that for a while, then got them to try before checking. I gave stars and stickers etc for clean bottoms for ages and then, by the time they were halfway through the 1st year at school (reception class), they were good enough to just do it themselves. They're 6&7 now and unless I catch a whiff or see them itching I just leave it up to them.

I've just started teaching my 5 year old, right now I'm doing it and letting him try after, i'm hoping to slow build up to him trying first and me just cleaning up the mess.

Thanks for your replies, what happens at school are they just left to it?

If we know a child needs a lot of help in wiping the bottoms, or if they have an accident and wet/soil themselves, or if for some reason they're not completely potty trained by reception, we (teaching assistants usually rather than teachers unless it's an emergency) will change them and clean them up as necessary. We work with parents to help toilet train the child where it's needed. We don't otherwise check their bottoms though or help with wiping, unless there is a smell or the child is uncomfortable. Does that make sense?

Just to add to my post above, my own children are now generally fine with wiping their bums but have occasionally come home from school with skid marks and I'm confident that they're not the only ones!

The only time school will change or clean up a toilet trained child (assuming no send issues of course) is if they have actually soiled or they are very smelly and in obvious discomfort. It's generally assumed that they can sort themselves out.

Following this, I’m in an identical situation. My son is almost 4 but still very toddler-shaped and just doesn’t have the reach or the dexterity required. He starts school in Sep and this is my main worry!

An OT friend recommended building up the dexterity by sitting them on a Pilates ball, start by putting stickers on the back of the ball for them to reach behind themselves to find, then graduating to wiping off a blob of cream off the back of the ball. Not sure if it works.

Say "Stick your tummy out," then it's easier for them to reach behind iykwim

Best to start early. My dd is 19 months and wipes her bum ( not well but she does it) and watches me and daddy wipe. Just try encouraging 'your turn' after every try

Give them a plate with a blob of peanut butter on it and some kitchen roll. Show them how to wipe /pinch it so they aren't smearing it around the plate, how to fold over the tissue etc, and it gives them a visual idea of what's going on behind them.

And they love practising too.

@Emmafh3 you do realise that the op's child is 4 so as fascinating as it is to hear that your child can do hers already, your advice to "start early" is pretty pointless. Unless of course you know a way to rewind time.

I thought I'd put it in there for any mumas who are reading and have younger ones. Thank you very much.
My point still stands with encouraging to do it on his own too every time.
And yes I do know how to rewind time @ridesallyride76, but I most certainly won't be sharing it with you.

Mumas? I think we've caught ourselves a nethun.

^^ sorry, that was uncalled for.

My ds starts school in September and although he is willing, lacks competence. I'm tempted to send him in with toilet wipes but they are awful for the environment. On the upside, he has more of an evening schedule so hopefully it won't be a regular issue.

Might be different from school to school but when I asked to send toilet wipes in for my ds I was refused. I guess they're a nuisance as you can't flush them?

Good point, I'll have to double check knees.

Our allows wipes and are really good about helping / advising when the child needs it.