Helping DS with his friend (ASD)

[dontknowwhattodo80]

Hi,

DS (10) has a friend who was diagnosed, aged 6, with Asperger's syndrome. His Friend is unaware of the diagnosis.

DS really likes his friend but struggles with some of his behaviour. His friend always has to be right about everything, will shout at DS if he has a different opinion etc . DS struggles with anxiety issues and is quite shy.

The longer it's going on the harder DS is finding it to cope with. Friends Mum doesn't do anything or say anything and it's hard to know what to say as I have to be careful as the ASD diagnosis is a secret . Naturally Friends mum is very protective so if she felt I said anything to DS about his friend then she would not be happy. His Mum tends to laugh and thinks it's quite funny, or justifies it all.

So I feel stuck in a hard place. I can't say anything, nor can I tell DS to ignore his friend as either would not go down well, at all. I wouldn't want him to ignore his friend either, I just want to find a way to say to DS that I know it upsets him ( his friend can be very aggressive - shouting) but that his friend doesn't mean it. DS just thinks his friend isn't nice to him .

Any help on how to deal with this?

Thanks

Bump

Anyone?

The friend's mum isn't doing her ds any favours here and it isn't fair on you either. My dc knew they had ASD once they were diagnosed. Their small group of close friends know as do the class. Friends can't be expected to make allowances forever even with the knowledge so I'd be letting the friendship fade a bit. You don't have to be nasty but your child's wants are impotant too.

My son has severe ASD and ADHD and he can be quite full on with kids and adults. I think it's more of a mum issue than the friend issue because she's sticking her head in the sand. It's doing her son no favours.
Your son has a right to choose his friends though. There are books out there and you can possibly explain to your son about ASD?