18 month old still drinking loads of milk ?

[Babydreaming]

Hello!

I want some advice as feel that we are a bit stuck in a rut.

My 18 month has always been little (2nd-9th centile) and he’s really fussy about food. He often will eat nothing or very little at meals and so I tend to offer him milk after as I’m worried he isn’t getting enough. He tends to have about 600ml in the daytime and then he often wakes overnight too and can have up to 200ml. I know it’s way too much but otherwise I’m worried he won’t gain weight as he doesn’t eat! He knows how to drink water from his sippy cup but he isn’t very good at doing so and will often have less than 50ml water per day and that’s with lots of prompting...so I’m worried if I stop giving him milk he will be thirsty too and wake even more at night?

What were your little ones doing at 18 months? Should I just be stricter about limiting milk or does this seem okay and just wait for him to figure it out in his own time?

Have you tried the ' Your a big boy now so you should be eating lunch ( dinner or whichever meal ) I would personally cut back on the milk but you will get others disagree. My view is that he is filling up on it so doesn't want the food ( I know you say he is a fussy eater ) Try the one thing you probably vowed never to do. Bribery ! Let's eat this sandwich/ or pasta and then we will feed the ducks/ play in the garden etc. At that age they are trying to find themselves in their world and rejecting things is a way of having control.

Is he drinking milk from a bottle? If he is then of course he is going to prioritise that as it is so much easier. You should consider switching over to all daytime milk to a cup only, then switching the night feeds. Once he is on a cup happily then tackle the quantity issue. Only offer milk after he has eaten food, and never offer milk in between meals. One of my dc would always rather drink milk than eat, I dont think he liked the sensation of chewing much. I have to be very vigilant that he doesnt just fill up on milk at the begining of the meal as then he just says he isnt hungry. I also try and serve some foods at every meal that are easy to chew.

Try not to worry about the low centile, some kids are meant to be there and that is theor healthy weight. If you force them to eat more then they will just resist and it becomes even more difficult

I had this with dc4. He was a milk monster and was never really into food, he was still waking at night and having a bottle at 18months.
I cut right back on his milk and things instantly changed. His food intake went right up and he has been a good eater since then (hes 3 now)

@namethecat he’s not really speaking yet and has quite limited understanding so I’m not sure I can use bribery yet! When he doesn’t want his food he tends to just throw it on the floor and try and climb out of his highchair and there’s not much I can do to make him eat (believe me I’ve tried!). Maybe a useful technique for when he’s a bit older though?

@seatoski yes unfortunately he still wants bottles! I usually put it in a sippy cup first with his meal but he doesn’t touch it or only has a sip. He then doesn’t really eat much so I end up putting the milk in his bottle and giving him that which he then seems really thirsty for!! Really frustrating. I think you’re right about the centiles, I think he just doesn’t have a big appetite and will always be little!

@holycityzoo good to hear there is hope! I’m worried that if I cut down then he will drink more at night? Did this happen to you?

So you might have to get pushy for a couple of days on not offering bottles. So for example at breakfast, offer food then when he is done eating offer milk in a cup. Get him down when he is done with the cup. When he gets grumpy half an hour later (which he will as he will be thristy and hungry) offer milk in a cup. Rinse and repeat with a food snack offered at an appropriate time until lunch. Repeat the meal strategy at lunch and at dinner. Eventually he is going to start drinking more milk from the cup. If he is super resistant, you might have to switch to offering a cup at night right away (or he will just fill up at night instead) but I would always keep one bottle feed (8oz max) at bedtime until he has started drinking a reasonable quantity from a cup in one sitting.

He will probably be v grumpy and clingy while you force the transition because it wont be comfortable for him, but my thought is that it the right thing to do as if he is not eating much food, it is not good for his health and also for his speech (eating strengthens the mouth muscles needed for speech).

I did it quite brutally. I stopped giving him bottles at night and offered him water in a cup. He wasn't impressed but it only took a couple of days.
After night one of no milk/ bottle at night he was ready for his breakfast, I gave him milk in a slippy cup with breakfast. At about 10.30 I gave him a piece of fruit and some water. Then lunch at 12 followed by nap. I thought he would really struggle to get off to sleep without having a bottle as it was a real sleep cue for him but I think because he was eating much better at lunch time it helped. He needed lots of cuddles and I offered milk in a cup before going for a nap.
I made sure I did lots of physical activities with him in the first few days which helped with sleep.
I had a good chat with my health visitor before I did it as I felt guilty taking his bottle away but the night feeding was killing me and I was worried about him not really being interested in food.
It was so so worth it.
He's still not the best sleeper at 3 but I just think that's they way he is!!

Get rid of bottles. That's the solution.

Forget about centiles and just wait him out. He will eat but won't if he knows you're always giving in.