DD says she wants to “get skinnier”

[Metalhead]

DD1 has just turned 8 and has, for the past few months, started making half-joking comments about being fat or having a big tummy. Tonight, she said she’s going on a diet because she wants to get skinnier!

She is a perfectly healthy size, very sporty and has got hardly any fat on her. She does have a sweet tooth but obviously burns it all off by doing gymnastics, football and tennis, as well as just generally being active.

So far, we’ve kind of tried to brush it off and not make a big deal out of it, by just telling her that people have different body shapes, she’s fine as she is and it’s more important to be healthy. But I’m not sure wether that’s enough? I’m a bit lost, and honestly didn’t think I’d have to deal with this sort of issue for good few more years! Any advice on how best to handle this would be much appreciated.

At that age she must be absorbing this mindset from somewhere...school the groups and sports she does. Probably not at home from your post.
This may be difficult, I don't know how you live your life....but from now on I would, without making it a big deal, try to minimise her exposure to people who talk about being skinnier, losing weight, who use words like fat and diet etc. She has learned this rhetoric and it would be a good idea to try and stop it becoming linked to behaviours and mindsets that she may struggle to get out of, especially as she is coming up for difficult social/emotional times anyway.
Make sure you don't talk about food and eating in a negative way and the people you talk with. Don't buy into the culture online, magazines or on tv. Food is food, not good or bad. Your body is for keeping healthy, to look after so you live long and strong. Don't let her be exposed to the pervasive and destructive imagery, language and culture. Like I said, this may be easier said than done but it's where I would start.

I had this from DD who is a bit older now (11) but it started at that age.

I deal with it like I would anything else that sounded a bit daft and say something along the lines of 'don't be daft, you are strong, fit and healthy, what on earth makes you think that you 'need to be skinnier'. Then she will quote some girl who happens to be tiny (DD is already 5'5").

Then we talk about being healthy and fit enough to swim competitively, do park run, ride a bike and play tennis.

The Olympics seemed to put it to rest for a while tbh, all those fantastic female role models with strong healthy bodies rather than the vacuous magazine shots that pervade life.

I would look up someone like Jessica Ennis on youtube and talk about her strong healthy body if it continued.

Mind you I am no expert, haven't got an instruction book and make it all up every day - I was really shocked the first time I heard it!

Thanks for your replies. I’m pretty sure she’s getting it from girls at school, there is one girl in particular who is very skinny and who DD seems to be comparing herself with. I’ll just try to reinforce the health angle again for now.

It was the same here Metalhead, a few girls who were very aware of the world including make up and fashion etc., etc.. DD wasn’t and I didn’t expect it. My sister said she had the same thing with my niece at a similar age (now at uni and a lovely “normal” girl in every way).

So I reckon it is fairly common, just a bit of a shock when you first hear it.

Yes, my DD isn’t really into that sort of thing yet either, she just loves reading Harry Potter and the like. She ate normally today so clearly the whole idea of going on a diet didn’t last long... for now.