Feeling so guilty

[crazytired3]

So here goes

Went to a big city for a fun day out with DH and 3 small children. DH was he usual helpful self which meant I was hearding the kids. Older DS asks for me I say ‘Hang on a sec let me grab DS2 (youngest age 3) when boom no longer in my sight. Frantically look round and see DS2 sprinting down the street. I go chasing after leaving DH bemused as I’ve chucked two kids at him and legged it. Finally catch DS2 and
We both burst into tears.
I’m so angry at myself for loosing sight, that momentary lapse could
Have cost us so much! DH offered little to no comfort, hasn’t spoken about it even when I try to bring it up. So now my guilt is doubled because i feel he blames me even though he wasn’t helping.
Now I’m having nightmares about social services and people judging me. I don’t normally get so emotionally wound up but this has really upset me and I’ve got no one to talk to.

I'm sure everyone on here will sympathise. We've all been in a similar situation. You've had a nasty shock but luckily no harm done! I remember being on the beach in Majorca with my 2 Ds. The little one aged about 4 went walkabout, and attached himself to another family half a mile away (their food probably looked better!) Kids seem to be born with an escape mentality! Maybe next time put him on reins, or put him in DH arms and say "this one's yours"?

Blimey op you must have shat yourself to lose a 3 year old! We’ve all been there, it can happen so fast and as Single said no harm done.
Don’t beat yourself up.
Are you cross with DH?

A day out in a big city with 3 small DC and an unhelpful DH doesn’t sound like my idea of fun OP

Agree with *Single^’s suggestion of putting the youngest on reins and making it very clear to DH that ges in charge of him for the day next time.

You shouldn't feel guilty, you should be annoyed at DH.

Thanks guys. It’s. nice to know I’m
Not the only one.

I am very annoyed with DH. It’s more that he won’t talk about it or say anything. Plus it wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t trying to heard all 3.

That’s sounds terrifying. I’d be fuming at DH personally. You did nothing wrong at all. These things do happen and you can’t watch them every single second. My DS is 3 and I expect DH to watch him as much as I do in public. It’s his child too