Age to allow DC to choose when to turn out bedlight at bedtime

[Borris]

I'm starting to dread bedtime with dd age 7.5. She gets ready and goes up fine. We have a story but then for the next 30-60 mins she moans that she's not tired and can't sleep. It often ends up with me sat outside her room.

She's desperate to be allowed to read to herself but I'm not convinced she'd be responsible enough to turn off her light when tired as she's an avid reader and gets lost in the book.

What age did you start allowing your DC to choose what time they turned their lights out?

Post GCSEs here. Ds is 14 and I make sure he is in bed by 9pm (with no screens) mon-fri. He can read till 9:30 but is usually asleep by quarter past. Dd (11) has to give her phone up at 8 and lights out 8:30. Sleep is really important for brain development , learning and mental health.

5 and 6 year old get told a number on their digital clock that they can read to (the minute digits part) and then they're expected to turn out their lights. They're actually really really sensible and good with this!

My 5 yo turns his light off and goes to sleep after reading or playing. Up to half an hour sometimes but usually it’s ten minutes before he’s out!

I won't let my child fall asleep with a light on, even when he gets older. So won't be an issue for me

I have a 7.5 yr old dd too and a 15 yr old ds.

Ds is in an important year, is doing a couple of GCSE's a year early and is also doing mocks.
I still "tuck him in" ( his request ) at 10pm, he can do whatever he chooses before this time, normally gym and Fortnite with revision taking priority when exams are on.

He is allowed to have music on for bed and he tends to settle pretty quickly.
Of a weekend he self regulates, Friday and Saturday only, this can be either a really late night or a very normal bedtime, I let him have the control.

Dd is a madam and thinks she's missing out by going to bed! She has a great routine and is also an avid reader. Once in bed she knows that's it, apart from if she needs the toilet. She will read and then fall asleep pretty quickly, she has a lamp on low.

I think sleep is very important and as someone who suffers with severe insomnia i try and ensure my dc have a decent sleep, I'm tired, irritable and moody when I'm exhausted.
Holidays and when not in school I am much more flexible but still keep to some sort of routine re tea/shower etc.

I do think that she’s naturally a night owl. But that doesn’t help when you’ve got to get up for school!

Same with dd, she's a nightmare to get up for school!

Ds just gets up and gets in the shower, dd is more like "please give me 5 more minutes, I'm just opening my eyes blah blah"

I despair some days :)

My son would and will stay up all night reading if he can (age 7). He will find any source of light to do so, whether it’s holding two night lights together or sneaking into the bathroom.

So I don’t think it’s controlling to want them to sleep!

I won't let my child fall asleep with a light on, even when he gets older. So won't be an issue for me

Bwahhhh ha ha ha! yes, I thought that too, until he got to four snd started sobbing about the helicopters that came to kill him in the dark. he has slept with a light on ever since.

Good luck controlling THAT.

We've trialled ds10 being responsible for turning his own light out over the last week but he's just been too tired so tonight we've gone back to bed time at 8:30, read for half an hour, I go up to say goodnight and it's lights out.