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Parenting

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Original poster

Coping with two

5 replies

Outnumbered1225 · 30/04/2018 17:07

Feeling overwhelmed...

I have a 2.5yr old DD and a 2 month old DS. I just feel since my DS was born life is so hectic I am failing as a mum. I can't seem to strike a balance of playing with both my DC so I'm either neglecting one or the other to see to the other ones needs. I don't spend any quality time with my DD like I did when she was an only one, but I don't have any one to one time with my DS as my DD is always taking over. She is quite full on with him which makes him angry as she is always trying to lay on him, hold is hand but ends up hurting him. I know she doesn't mean to but it's so frustrating.

My DD does have nursery a couple of mornings a week but I'm usually so behind on housework etc that I end up having to catch up. People always say to lower your standards but there is only so far that goes, if we've got no clean clothes, I need to do the washing!

Any advice?? I feel so guilty all the time

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Caterina99 · 30/04/2018 18:21

I know what you mean. Very similar age gap here. It’s exhausting

Firstly the baby literally needs to be fed and nappy changed and naps etc and that’s about it. If you can actually do housework on nursery days then do it - or sit and have a cup of tea or take a nap or whatever you want to do. He doesn’t need one on one time apart from feeds.

Secondly I agree it’s difficult to give the older one full attention and deal with a baby. I found it was usually easier to go out. The baby would nap in the pram or sling and you can play with the toddler in the park.

Caterina99 · 30/04/2018 18:23

And then home and tv for toddler and an easy meal while you deal with baby. Hopefully she either naps or does some form of quiet time so you can get a bit of a break in the afternoon

Original poster

Outnumbered1225 · 30/04/2018 19:51

Thank you, I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds it hard work.
I just feel guilty sometimes when my baby has been left on the playmat on his own for ages, or my toddler asks me to read to her when the baby is screaming. I'm told one day they will entertain each other, I hope that's true!

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Ellieboolou27 · 30/04/2018 21:03

I found going from 1 to 2 so,so bloody hard, getting out the house, mealtimes, bathtomes and bedtimes filled me with dispair, at times I thought I was going to go crazy.

2 years on and it’s so much easier hope it’s less than 2 years for you but now my youngest is out of nappies and talking etc, it’s so much easier.

I still feel stretched and pulled but my kids are loved, fed, warm and clean, that means I’m doing ok

Ellieboolou27 · 30/04/2018 21:06

And yes! After 2 long years my girls now play happily together as well as fight like cat and dog

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