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Need some advice

8 replies

HalfSiblingsShock · 29/04/2018 13:35

Name changed as I think a few people know my usual username and could do with keeping this to myself for the time being.
A bit of a background, I have 2 dc with ExDh and one with my new partner of 4 years. ExDh has had numerous relationships since we split and had just started seeing someone new, he’s around 2 months into the relationship I think.
I have just found out I am pregnant with Dc4, due at the end of December, and I have just found out that ExDh’s new partner is pregnant, due in November.
I haven’t told Ex about my pregnancy as he was a bit worked up about his news, pregnancy is unplanned and he has always said he didn’t want anymore children, and I didn’t want to give him anymore reason to worry.
My question is, how the hell do I handle this with DC 1&2? How do I tell them they are going to have 2 new siblings a month apart, one by a woman they haven’t even met yet? Obviously I am planning to wait until after the first scan as is ExDh but I’m so worried about the confusion the news is potentially going to cause 😕
Any advice on how to handle this will be very welcome.

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 29/04/2018 18:12

I’d wait for now. If they’ve only been together for 2 months and exDH doesn’t want anymore, anything could happen.

JiltedJohnsJulie · 29/04/2018 18:13

Congratulations too Thanks

Knittedfairies · 29/04/2018 18:16

Maybe you could just tell them your news, as your ex’s partner’s pregnancy isn’t your news to give.

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Ivegotfamilyandidrinkcupsoftea · 29/04/2018 18:18

Tell them your news as planned after 12 week scan

Be prepared for dc to ask questions about woman dad has knocked up ....

HalfSiblingsShock · 29/04/2018 19:31

I wouldn’t tell them about Exdp’s partners pregnancy, I know that isn’t my place. Obviously they will have questions when I announce my pregnancy a matter of weeks after exdh does, how to best answer them questions is my concern

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HalfSiblingsShock · 29/04/2018 19:36

Thanks for the congrats JohnsJulie 😊.
As much as the situation kind of disappearing would make things easier from my side, dc’s are going to have a half sibling out there that there’s a chance they might not be close to due to exdh’s stupidity 😔
Selfishly this feels like the shine and excitement has gone from my pregnancy because of how worried I am about the situation confusing dc’s

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Ivegotfamilyandidrinkcupsoftea · 29/04/2018 19:37

How old are dcs op

HalfSiblingsShock · 29/04/2018 19:44

They’re 8 & 5.

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