Breastfeeding question.. Unsure where to post?

[Twounder1]

My baby is almost 3 weeks old and I'm not sure if any milk has come in yet :( how would I know? I do try and breastfeed him 90% of the time. (having to combination feed a bit as he was so big and can't sustain himself and breastfeeding isn't enough. My breasts don't leak, they're not bigger, I can't hear him gulp, nothing :( I don't think he's getting anything. Weight loss is slowly creeping back up from birth but not enough :( any advice?

When you get him weighed is there any concern about him?

Have you tried hand expressing or using a pump?

Does he have frequent wet and dirty nappies? Have you spoken to your hv?

1. Expressing isn't a good indicator of milk production

1. How big was your baby? My 11lb 7oz baby was EBF. I never heard him gulp EVER.

1. Formula top ups will reduce your supply - the more you baby sucks, the more you make.

1. If he's gaining weight, that's a good sign.

1. It's perfectly ok to FF 👍🏻

I thought this around 3 weeks too. I was convinced he wasn’t getting enough milk from me (for whatever reason) because DS wasn’t gaining weight, or back to birth weight, and he wasn’t wetting nappies wasn’t often enough. If you’re not having these problems then your DS is getting enough milk from you!

Expressing is not necessarily an indicator of supply. I exclusively bf mine to 6 months and could never express however hard I try. .

Op-if your baby is alert, peeing, pooing, gaining weight, even if slowly, and reasonably settled he's getting enough.

If you watch his neck is he swallowing? When he's unlatched does he have any milk dribble?

Not really swallowing an no milk dribble. He just sucks me dry. His appetite is mental. I've never known a baby like it. I'll breast feed him on both for around 40 mins and he will scream for more food so I'll sometimes give formula. He will plough through 5 ounces straight after at almost 3 weeks old! I just feel like he's getting nothing from the breast at all. He's gaining weight slowly but a lot he throws up. He's constantly being sick and it's a lot :( wet nappies are fine etc. Midwife hasn't discharged me yet. She wants me to weigh him this week again to see if there is any real concern but says this is normal? :( I want to ebf but even the midwife who delivered him told me I'd need to combination feed

I don't express or even have a pump. I tried with dd but when expressing I couldn't even make up quarter of an ounce. But she was mainly formula fed. I didn't have any support with breastfeeding with her

Could you google breastfeeding support in your area? My little one had super long feeds and always hungry - turned out to be tongue tied. Midwife, health visitor and GP all missed it

Sorry I don’t have an answer but was going to suggest like MissV that you should visit a BF support group. They were a godsend for me when I had issues during first few weeks.

There's a phone number for the local one but I've lost it and online the number doesn't work really annoyingly :(

How many oz of formula is he having in a day?

I had a similar experience with DD. She would feed for ages and extremely frequently. I could never see her swallowing, and my boobs rarely felt full or leaked. Her weight gain was very slow for the first 4-5 weeks (she never lost weight after the initial loss in the first few days but did drop 2 or 3 centiles).

I had a fab HV who kept a close eye on her due to the poor weight gain, but reassured me she wasn’t really concerned as she looked healthy and was having plenty of wet and dirty nappies.

We knew that her constant feeding and poor weight gain were probably due to her bad tongue tie, and things improved once that was snipped at 3 weeks. Has your DS been assessed for tongue tie and has your latch been checked? I’d recommended a breastfeeding support group / lactation consultant as tongue tie can often be missed by midwives.

If he’s throwing up a lot he must be swallowing some in the first place. Don’t take not leaking or feeling full as a sign of no milk - DD was EBF til weaning at 6 months (still feeding at night now at 1) and I stopped using breast pads completely at about 3 months.

Also, they will guzzle formula. It’s far less effort for them to get that out of a bottle than it is to get BM from you, and it will always satisfy them longer than BM as it slower to digest. Taking a lot of formula isn’t a sign that you don’t have enough milk.

I found the first 6 weeks or so horrendous - it was relentles, I found it very painful and had cracked nipples, and I was so anxious she wasn’t getting enough as I couldn’t see the evidence. It absolutely does get easier though! DD is now the most efficient feeder ever and climbed back up the centiles well before starting solids.

I remember the worry well, hope things get easier for you soon.

Also, I’d take the midwife who delivered him saying you’d have to combination feed with a pinch of salt. I admit I’m no expert but I can’t see how she can know that by looking at you both. A big baby does not mean that you can’t EBF.

Get in touch with local support group midwife could give you number again at 3w my baby would feed for hours on and off vomit then feed again - take advise from your midwife as she can check both you and baby over x

Could it possibly be because I'm not drinking enough? Since I've had him I'm barely eating or drinking. I think I've had three dinners In the past three weeks an I don't have breakfast. Just drabs off my daughter's meals. I manage about two glasses of water a day if that..
I imagine he would take what he needs from what I've got but I've just realised I'm not looking after myself..

You said when you tried pumping you couldn’t get much out. There could be several reasons for this. Some women just don’t respond to a pump, depending on how old the baby is you may not get much or it’s not the right pump for you. I tried so many and got just a dribble until I hired a hospital grade pump, difference was amazing. I also found Kellymoms website incredibly helpful. Agree that trying to find rl support would be great but I know that’s not easy sometimes. Look after yourself make sure you’re eating and drinking well. You are doing amazing despite what you’re thinking, bf is way much harder than I thought. Also agree wholeheartedly that fed is best whether bf or ff. Good luck!

Just seen your update! I know it’s hard, especially if you haven’t got any help and feel too tired to sleep but you do need to eat and drink more. Have a bottle of water next to you all the time and healthy snacks to graze on, within easy reach when you’re bf. You can eat/drink at the same time as bf, not easy sometimes I know!

I just don't have the time or care about myself enough anymore to do it. I'd rather my children be fed first than me so it's this vicious circle. But I've stupidly just realised water intake and breast milk, obvious correlation. I'm too tired to process it right now. I'm getting so fed up. I've just tried so hard but be either latches or doesn't at all. An he fights me terrible. His arms are always in the way so I can't get the boob anywhere near him, he tries to lift his head and I feel like I'm hurting him to push his head forward gently because of the soft spots. It's getting me really down :(

You must look after yourself. I’m terrible for not drinking enough. My HV advises me to make a cup of tea and get a glass of water before every feed. It was hard as they were so frequent but it really didn’t do DD any harm to wait a couple of minutes. As soon as she’d fallen asleep I’d boil the kettle, get my water and a snack, the phone charger and remote and if she was still asleep put a load of washing in then it was more often than not straight back to feeding. Had to force myself to drink but it is important to look after yourself as well as DS

Is he your first baby? I found with my 2nd and third that I regulated my supply much quicker than I did with my first. I rarely felt full or leaked like I had with my first.

Definitely get proper advice tomorrow, phone the health visitor or midwife and make sure you are seen. Has baby put on weight? Wet nappies? If you aren’t making enough milk, it is far better for baby to know sooner than later and if you are making enough milk, it will put your mind at ease sooner.

And you do need to prioritise yourself a bit, go and get yourself a drink and something to eat NOW! Don’t read anything else on mumsnet until you have done that, your body needs refuelling so you can make milk for your baby.

If you’re really struggling the National
Breastfeeding Helpline are fab. I cried down the phone to the loveliest lady and she really did help. They’ll be closed now I think but you can ring first thing.

Like I said earlier it really does get so much easier and to me it was totally worth persevering through the rough bits, but there is nothing wrong with giving formula if that’s what works for you. Look after yourself

I had to combination feed too first child for 6 weeks second child for 10 weeks. What really helped me was using a supplemental nursing system. It was a bottle I hung round my neck with a little tube that I taped next to my nipple. So when my baby suckled at the nipple they got whatever I produced and what ever was in the SNS. (Sometimes expressed breast milk, sometimes artificial formula). It meant baby was getting "enough" and my breasts were always being stimulated to feed.
I'll see if I can find a link to one. Really helped me. Might help you.