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15 month old cries all day every day. Please help!

19 replies

NotGoingToPlan · 17/04/2018 08:13

Hello, I've posted before about struggling with my DS, I'm still struggling and having a really bad day today already and it's only 8am!
My DS is 15 months old and he cries/whinges/throws tantrums pretty much all day long! It starts about 10 minutes after he wakes up in the morning and doesn't stop until he goes to bed at night. I would like to be able to say it's just a phase but he's cried since the moment he was born!

He had colic as a baby so the crying seemed endless then and though it's supposed to improve with age he's still crying to this day! He's alright when we are in the car or the pushchair to a point, after about 30 mins he will start crying again. I take him out for plenty of walks, runs in the play park, shopping trips, drives in the car but all end the same way, a screaming tantrum on the floor. He doesn't like to get in or out of the pushchair or car seat. He won't hold my hand when walking along so if I have to grab his arm to steer him in a different direction he will drop to the floor and scream. Leaving the park is the worst.

These kind of tantrums started at around 11 months for him and have gradually gotten worse. He pushes boundries at home and just laughs and carries on when told no. He doesn't have any words at all yet so perhaps part of it could be due to frustration at not being able to communicate. He doesn't point at anything or wave or clap either so there is very little communication going on besides his whinging.

His eating on the other hand is terrible. He had reflux and suspected Cows Milk Protien allergy so he was sick all the time after every feed and it caused him a lot of discomfort to feed so weaning was very difficult. He flatly refuses to eat anything with any lumps in it so will only eat puree smooth baby jars. I've tried everything to get him onto solids but he just won't.

He also won't use a sippy cup so still has a bottle which I heard was bad for teeth but I don't know what to do when I can't get him to drink from anything else. I've tried just taking away his bottle and using only a cup but he refuses it to the point of dehydration. The same with food. He refuses to eat all day long then gets even more whingey because he's so hungry.

I'm just looking for any kind of advice or stories from people who are/were in a similar situation and what happened? I'm getting very worried that he's only going to get more and more difficult as he gets older.

I should add that I have very little help and support, I work 3 days a week which my mother looks after him for but she won't help out more than that as she finds him too difficult and my partner works long hours and is only home 2 weekends of the month so having a day off is not really an option for me.

Sorry for the essay! Any advice appreciated!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NotGoingToPlan · 17/04/2018 11:41

Anyone?

OP posts:
marshmy · 17/04/2018 11:46

bumpThanks

hicketypickety · 17/04/2018 11:48

Bump

I hope things improve for you soon.

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HoppingPavlova · 17/04/2018 11:48

I think you will be best placed to have an assessment performed by a developmental paed.

PineappleScrunchie · 17/04/2018 11:48

I’ve had two like this. Sadly I think it’s personality! My dd is still pretty highly strung at 6! DS2 is 18months and basically tantrums all day.

But on the positive side, the actual tantrums seemed to be done by 2.5 for Dd and she became pretty rational, whereas ds1 was a dream baby and young toddler but started tantrumming at 3 and still does it now at 4 and it a whole lot more embarrassing when you have a giant 4yo flopping about on the floor in a rage!

Pondering1 · 17/04/2018 11:52

Didn't want to read and run. My 15month DS won't take milk out of a cup (gets milk in a bottle at bedtime only) and during the day he gets water in a straw cup. He got the hang of it when we put some yoghurt on the end and he sucked it off and realised how to drink out of it. Maybe tempt him with some sugar free diluting juice? And maybe not the best advice but try a chocolate button as a treat to get him eating solids and getting him
chewing? I don't know very many toddlers who would refuse that! Then maybe could progress to chocolate covered fruit? My son has a big sweet tooth so he eats a lot of fruit, especially loves watermelon and blueberries.

Pondering1 · 17/04/2018 11:53

And as for tantrums, mines is the same! He doesn't understand 'no' yet so I find distracting with play from whatever he isn't allowed to be touching the only thing to prevent a kick off.

Movablefeast · 17/04/2018 11:58

Have you screened him for Celiac Disease and other serious food related health issues?

Frogqueen13 · 17/04/2018 12:01

What's his hearing like if he isn't looking at you and you call his name does he turn to you?

MollyDaydream · 17/04/2018 12:04

What was his developmental check with the HV like at 12 months?

NotGoingToPlan · 17/04/2018 14:24

Coincidently I received a letter today from his paediatrician asking for a follow up review concerning his reflux so hopefully I can air some of my concerns there. I'm always a little nervous to ask professionals about DS as my experiences with GPs and HV have been them thinking I'm just a over worried first time mum (which may well be true as 15 months of crying tends to scramble your brain a bit! ) I've never really gotten too much advice from either other than he will grow out of it. But from being around others with children of similar ages their's just seem a lot more laid back and easier, but it could just be his personality.

I will try the yogurt on the end of a straw cup and see if that brings any joy, it's worth a try. I've been trying a few biscuits and treats with him and he has been putting them in his mouth but when it comes to the actual chewing and eating business he just spits it all back out.

He has not been screened for anything as I have a hard time getting anywhere at the GPs. It took forever to get refered to a dietician who said it was likely CMPA and gave him special milk formula.

His hearing seems normal, I think he can hear me but when he's not looking at me I have noticed he doesn't respond to his name being called.

12 month check happened when he was 11 months and as he'd just started to walk the HV said he seemed fine although she did pick up on his lack of eating and gave suggestions to try all of which have not worked.

I guess it's going to be a grin and bear it situation and hope he does grow out of it. It's just the constant whinging and tantrums that I'm finding very difficult to cope with but no one like's them I suppose!

Thanks for your replies everyone.

OP posts:
MollyDaydream · 17/04/2018 14:27

There's a M-CHAT screening tool you can do yourself, it gives you an idea if autism is a concern. He might be slightly young for it now.

moita · 17/04/2018 14:45

Does he go to any toddler groups? My son will eat things at those he never would at home, a bit of peer pressure is an amazing thing!

Also have you tried baby sign? My son can sign for bed/food and milk now which does lessen his frustration.

I really feel for you though. DS is the same age and threw himself on the floor in a tantrum this morning as I wouldn't give him the printer cartridge he could see on a shelf Hmm Proper tears and everything...it's a trying age!

NotGoingToPlan · 17/04/2018 15:42

He doesn't go to any yet as the only one on in my area is on a day that I work and my mum doesn't want to take him as she struggles with his behaviour when she's out in public (I guess I'm more used to it than her so his tantrums in public don't bother me as much as her)

I did the MCHAT out of interest and it said risk for autism but I think it may be better to do it when he's older so I'm going to try to not pay too much attention to the result.

DS is currently having a screaming fit in the floor as we came back into house through the back door and didn't stop to play in the garden. Hmm

OP posts:
ttrrii · 08/12/2021 11:26

@NotGoingToPlan how are things now?

JuneOsborne · 08/12/2021 11:30

Wow, that's a long time to leave it to check back in! But I'm interested to see if the op comes back and updates after all these years!

Skysblue · 08/12/2021 11:39

It’s very hard to say without meeting the child, but as soon as I started reading the first lines of your post I thought ‘I bet there’s a food issue’ because the behaviour is so much like my DC when they’re hungry (or when they’ve had too much screentime 😬).

It also sounds like possible special needs but I’m no authority on that.

My suggestion would be to start making your own purees. Get a nutribullet or blender of some kind and make sure that top quality high protein high carb is going in. For example you could blend cooked chicken with carrots and apple to make a smooth paste. Or blend porridge oats and nuts with apple juice. There are recipe suggestions online. You can make a batch one morning, freeze them in an ice cube tray then defrost when needed.

No added sugar, he’ll just get a blood sugar crash which again makes him grumpy.

Good luck.

LapinR0se · 08/12/2021 11:46

Does he sleep?

Seeline · 08/12/2021 11:50

CHILD WOULD BE NEARLY 5YO NOW

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