Kids damage Airbnb and I’m made to feel like a hopeless parent

[Retromumma]

On our way home from our Airbnb today the host texted to say that they had been resanding and painting floorboards after our visit because they said one of our kids dropped oil on it from the oil diffuser “they must have been waving one of the sticks around and it has removed paint from the floorboards” I am absolutely staggered by this because a) I cleaned and left everything spotless before leaving and b) certainly didn’t notice any damage to the floor and I would have noticed because I went around checking it for Lego before leaving.

I’m also astonished that oil reed diffusers can strip paint, not sure it should have just been left on display if it is so corrosive, what if it had burned one of my kids skin?

Or am I being unreasonable? Should I offer to pay for any damage? I am an honest person and never damaged anything, this has really soured the trip for us, I feel terrible!

Any responsible Airbnb landlord should have insurance for exactly this sort of event. Airbnb even offer insurance.

If they didn't buy insurance than they were stupid.

All of the above. Don’t offer to pay!

But do you really think you’ve been ‘made to feel like you’re a hopeless parent’ over this?

I’ve had other people kids in my house and stuff damaged, I accept it’s kids and kind of goes with the territory. It did feel a bit precious, too many pretty Knick knacks. But at the same time it’s made me
Feel pretty pants, they told me they are “disappointed in us”

Maybe text back “Sorry to hear that. I did a thorough check before leaving and everything was spotless” then leave it at that.

Oh honestly, this is batshit. I'd just ignore them.

I've had 2 reed diffusers strip patches of paint off 2 pieces of furniture. I was really surprised - both times (happened about 10 years apart). They were nice ones from JL so didn't expect them to be corrosive - I think it might actually just be the oil. I think some oils are pretty good at breaking down certain types of adhesives etc (I use olive oil to remove real stickers from jars).
Definitely not saying you're a bad parent (I'm sure you are wonderful) just saying it can happen!

I would email and say you are surprised to get the message because you checked very carefully when cleaning the property and didn't see the damage described. Ask if they check the property after every letting and also ask if they have insurance.

I would also query whether it is usual or acceptable to ask for payment like this - what is normal Airbnb protocol - it is a damage deposit or clients to pay if damage is caused to an unlimited amount - latter seems unlikely.

The thing is, can you be absolutely sure the children didn't do it? Have you asked them? If you have any doubt can you offer a goodwill gesture of £100?

This isn't just about the legalities and technicalities, although it is partly about this, but also about the moral side and doing the right thing too - which OP is interested in.

It would be possible to refuse to pay a penny because there was no damage deposit and they should have insurance. Some people would refuse to pay a penny even if they knew they'd caused the damage. However, the op needs to consider both the legalities and what feels right. I'd agree that if the kids have caused damage, something ought to be offered - but the owners also need insurance.

olive oil gets stickers off?
thanks for the tip

Yes, OP, you’ve let them down, you’ve let AIrBnb down, and most of all you’ve let yourselves down. Disappointed in you? Give me strength....

And get over the 'bad parent' thing.

I suspect that they mean they are disappointed you didn't mention the damage if some was caused, not your parenting skills.

Disappointed in you?! I'm afraid I would have lost my temper at that and sent an extremely shirty message in response. This isn't the first time I have heard about this kind of petty shite from Air BnB owners and it is why I would never use them. Who can be arsed with that kind of drama?

If they've left anything lying around that kids could easily access that will strip paint they're lucky they're not being sued tbh.

@newtlover so does cheap as chips sunflower etc oil. Or chip oil I expect, never tried that.

Don't pay. Do ask for evidence.

dont pay. This is the type of thing that is bound to happen if you say your airbnb is fine for kids but then put reed diffusers in it!!

I use airbnb loads and this sounds really over the top.
I once bled all over an airbnbs sheets unfortunately (had recently given birth thought id stopped bleeding but hadnt) but the host was absolutely lovely about it even though I could not get the stains out by washing it. She even left us a good review as it was clearly an accident.

Sometimes you do get the odd weird host. Please dont feel you need to pay or feel guilty. It doesnt sound like you were a bad guest at all it sounds like either theyve made it up or it was an accident that you just didnt notice.
If you are running an airbnb then thats just par for the course! You dont criticise guests for small accidents that they may have been completely unaware of.
Of course if someone leaves a bit of a tip you would complain. But for tipping over a reed diffuser and not noticing.... no.

I just feel mortified that my kids could have caused that level of damage and for me to not notice... kids say they don’t know anything about it btw

Also, when we arrived and they were there to hand over keys my son asked if they had Netflix and they looked very disapproving. I hate being made to feel like this, felt they were really looking down their nose at us

The hosts haven’t actually asked for any money, have they? They’re just flagging what they have found. It’s generally good manners to let hosts know if you’ve broken things so perhaps they’re annoyed you didn’t mention it. I’d just message them back with the truth, saying you checked the place and didn’t see any damage. What age are your kids - can you ask them if they did do it?

Re insurance, it’s a total pain to reclaim, especially for a tiny job like this. I don’t think it’s fair to expect Airbnb hosts to just suck up damage to what is often their home. you also need to decide if you are ok with getting a low rating yourself.

Id honestly leave them a bad review. They sound nuts and overbearing. Youd be saving people from wasting their money staying somewhere so tense!

If they dont like kids and expect the place to be kept utterly spotless they should not advertise as accepting kids. Please dont be made to feel guilty. These people are supposed to be running a business. You paid them to be there, they werent hosting you out of the goodness of their heart. They arent relatives. They seriously deserve a bad review for making you feel like this and the over the top email. I personally would not want to stay in a place where the host had behaved like that.

Just ignore the text, you won't be going back and as others have said this is what accidental damage insurance is for. Some people have forgotten that they were once children, interested in the stuff around them that adults have left within their reach....

Some hosts are a pain in the ass. We stayed somewhere last year and their BBQ rusted through and collapsed mid cooking. We were very lucky nobody was injured! They tried to charge us $400 for that and $400 for us 'not showering before bed' we did, every night, but their white sheets were slight stained. (would've been fine with a bit of bleach!)

I left them a review using my mobile on the journey home, I got the text after leaving a great review!

Kids are 8 & 6 and we were hardly there, just used it to sleep mainly, ate out and we were in the area visiting friends.

We also followed the house rules and took our shoes off when entering, I made beds before leaving, tidied and cleaned kitchen. I would have noticed, and honestly saw nothing. I have even checked photos I took during stay and nothing visible

The whole experience has really put me off Airbnb

I would be tempted to write back saying how disappointed you are that they left such a corrosive liquid within easy reach of young children and how relieved you are to be able to say confidently that they did not touch it as it might have caused damage to their skin. Make it clear that you did check everywhere before you left.

The other thing not ringing true to me is that they messaged you to say theyve had to strip and paint.. but never offered any photo evidence to you regarding such "damage".. if they cant prove there was any ever damage cause theyve already "fixed" it.. they cant prove anything happened while you were there. The whole thing just screams them wanting to claim from you for their own decorating wants. They specifically mentioned "kids waving around" not a spilage, so the damage would really be a few small spots if anything at all.. not a big spill worthy of a full resand. If youre gonna rent your property these are the things you have to expect.. just like if you own a caravan or chalet.. things get worn etc.

I'd just ignore it. They should have insurance or take a deposit and it sounds like they are trying it on.

Just apologise OP, they are probably just a bit piqued right now.
I have a rental property and occasionally do have to repaint or repair between rentals (most recently for red wine splashed on the walls which wouldn't wash off). That is the job so I didn't feel the need to reprimand the previous guests.

Those oil things have a warning on it saying you should wash your hands after touching them! So I'd be annoyed they left them somewhere your kids might have unknowingly touching the toxic oils.