If your child has ADHD, please can I have some advice?

[whereiscaroline]

DS is 11. Really, really struggling to cope with his meltdowns when things don't go his way. He's getting quite destructive and I'm really at a loss for what to do to help to diffuse him.

Examples are that when he's in a rage, he will purposely cause work for me, eg pulling pillows and blankets off beds, slamming doors, banging walls.

As soon as he's out of "the red zone" he calms down and is usually very sorry and upset. Ignoring him and letting the anger all come out does help. But when things around you are being torn apart and ruined intentionally, it's really hard to stay calm and not to get upset or angry myself.

Please if you have any tips for either getting him out of the "angry zone" or for damage limitation I'd really appreciate them. At my wit's end.

My biggest bit of advice is don’t take it personally, it’s not about creating more work for you, or about you at all. It’s about him being out of control of his emotions.

When they get to that point it can be close on impossible to bring them down before they are “ready” with ds often a bear hug will help but sometimes it’s just a case of making sure he is safe and damage limitation.

The ideal is to be able to identify the triggers and avoid/reduce them but of course that is often easier said than done

Thank you for the advice. At the moment his trigger is the word "no" it seems! I try to focus on praise and avoid punishment where I can, but he's had his Xbox removed for a few days as he pushed me, and he's being a total nightmare.

It's such a rollercoaster!