My child eats NOTHING

[altkat]

Ok, so not nothing. Lots of boob. SO MUCH BOOB. But he's 19 months and this is what he ate today:

1 Ella pouch (carrots, apples, parsnips)
2 fingers of brown toast with peanut butter
1 sippy cup of milk
Greek yogurt

He refused:

Pasta with pesto (also refused this yesterday)
Blueberries
Raspberries
Baked potato with butter
Baked beans

All of the above (bar the beans) he will usually deign to eat perhaps 3 spoonfuls of. If he can identify a vegetable, it's going on the floor. Meat is only occasionally acceptable.

At this point I honestly don't know how he survives. This food refusal has been going on for nearly the whole time he's been weaned. Please, at this point I'll take any advice going. How can I encourage him to eat?!

Honestly it doesn't seem that bad, he ate some veg!

You just have to keep trying, give him a multi vitamin in the meantime and remember it is your job to put healthy food in front of him, it is HIS job to eat it.

What is his weight like?

I do sympathise, I have had two really reluctant eaters. One has properly grown out of it and one is four and has a very restrictive diet, but that one has other issues complicating matters.

DSis had a boob loving food refuser. She had limited success with offering food first and boob afterwards. But mostly it got better in time. Does he go to nursery? DNephew would always eat quite well at nursery presumably as boob wasn’t an option and he was copying the other kids!

Have you tried your health visitor (or paediatrician if not in the UK) for ideas?

Aww, I had a very similar one and was advised to stop breastfeeding by a dietician. It did improve her eating although she is 10 now, still pretty slim and v fussy but tall so obviously thriving on some level. Good luck! It's frustrating! I had been happy to breastfeed until that point (prob 21 months I think!!) but it was also nice to be kinda given 'permission' to stop. She was also a terrible sleeper and that improved a bit too!!

Have you tried soup ? Make it with soldiers to dip

Get him involved in making food .

As summer is coming hopefully grow some fruit .

If he is also eating small amounts maybe graze rather than a proper meal.

I also would say to try and relax they do pick up on your feeling

I also have a 19 month old food refuser it is worrying but aside of forcing her to eat there's nothing I can do except keep offering food! Some days I wonder how my little girl is growing, she eats so little! But it is steadily increasing... try a multivitamin, that's what I'm going to do.

I would honestly reduce boob offered to early morning and last thing at night and just offer food and water from cup during the day. Milk is a food and is most likely filling him up so he does not want any solid food. Offer some soft easy to eat food eg. yogurt, puree fruit and custard. Monitor weight.

I would honestly reduce boob offered to early morning and last thing at night and just offer food and water from cup during the day. Milk is a food and is most likely filling him up so he does not want any solid food. Offer some soft easy to eat food eg. yogurt, puree fruit and custard. Monitor weight

I’m confused.

Why would you reduce a high calorie food ( BM) and seek to replace it with a low calorie food ( like fruit purée ) if you want a child to gain weight ?

Thank you so much for the responses, it's heartening to know he is not the only one existing on fresh air and attitude . He does have vitamin drops in his milk cup every day at least. Not in nursery yet (hopefully soon) so I suppose he'll have to eat something when breast milk isn't an option. He is a healthy weight last time we checked, tall and on the slim side but following his curve. I just don't know how!

We've tried soup (observes in disgust, treats dipped bread/toast as though I've personally pooed on it) but perhaps some more interesting flavours would help. He also refuses traditional baby favourites - any cereal, bananas, apples. Rice is an affront to his dignity, as far as I can tell.

It's been suggested I BF less but as he's been teething constantly for four months I'd feel awful taking that comfort away . Shall call health visitor in the morning.

My DD ate nothing until she turned 3 and now she has about 5 meals a day!

Have a read of My Child Won’t Eat.

It won’t make your child eat, but it will reset your expectations to something reasonable.

I don’t know the solution but my 15 month old is exactly the same. Absolute refusal of 90per cent of the foods he is offered. Now he’s learned to throw overarm, it’s all got a bit messy for us

He’ll eat biscuits by the barrel but that’s about it. Everything else is totally hit and miss (mostly miss). No toast, cereal, fruit, pasta, eggs etc.

He’s ok and is a healthy weight but still breastfeeds a lot. I’m just hoping he’ll grow out of it.

My youngest is 21 mo and that sounds better than many of his days!

And he feeds through the night too.

My DD was a nightmare to wean. I recall trying to get her to eat ANYTHING that wasn’t breast milk as she plummeted down the centile charts between 9months and 2 years old. Dietician gave really helpful advice like “feed her more”.

At around 2 she started eating. She’s nearly 4 now, still little but eats pretty well. Still small amounts but without a fuss. Weaned her off breast at 2.5 without too much pain despite her love of it.

Sit him on your lap with 'your food' in front and ignore him, see if he takes interest in sneaking some of your food (tastes nicer when it isn't your own)

Sorry I have no advice but if he’s not dropping down the charts like my DD was I’d not worry.

Even my awkward madam just seemed to be finding her true line, she’s maintained just over the 3rd centile since turning 2.

My 3 1/2 year old has always been like this, although I weaned him from bf when he was 2 1/2 - it made no difference on how much he ate. I have had some success with a sectioned plate. It means that when I plate his up I put maybe 6 pasta twirls, a spoonful of chilli, a few baby carrots and cucumber slices (the veg/salad that he likes) some apple slices, a couple of crackers etc. I provide colourful, healthy ish selection and put it in front of him. He decides if he eats and how much. At the end of the meal it goes away and that's it. He has one cup of milk before bed now. He's a fire cracker, full of energy and doing well so he must be getting what he needs! He seems to do much better with a wide selection of little quantities of portions.

@TittyGolightly I'll read that immediately. Do you think if I read aloud to him he'll feel ashamed and try to do better?

@JaniceBattersby We did go through a phase of throwing, now he either yells at the food or daintily drops it over the side of the chair. At least the walls are now safe, and we've replaced the rug.

@GreenTulips I'll try that in the morning! We have an avocado in so I'll see if he'll share an entitled-millennial breakfast.

Pretty sure my mother told me she just gave in to me when I was small and let me subsist on nothing but lamb chops and tinned peaches for about 8 months. Perhaps karma does exist...at least I'll eat everything I can find now.

@IDefinitelyWould Sectioned plate has been ordered. If all else fails DH can use it for keeping house keys/change/miscellaneous USB drives in

I know this is easy to say but please try not to worry. He is getting plenty calories from BM otherwise he would be dropping weight and you say he’s not.

I suspect you over estimate the calories in other foods and underestimate those in BM. You say in the title thread that he’s eating nothing but he obviously is.

kellymom.com/nutrition/starting-solids/babyfoodcalories/

Your child is thriving. Everything is OK.

Proper scientific information about breastfeeding a toddler here

kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/ebf-benefits/

More good advice here from Kellymom ( despite the odd name it’s a very reputable site with good advice and links to medical and other owner reviewed research ).

Some toddlers are eating very few solids, or even no solids, at 12 months. This is not unusual and really depends on your child – there is quite a big variation. We like to see breastmilk making up the majority (around 75%) of baby’s diet at 12 months. Some babies will be taking more solids by 12 months, but others will still be exclusively or almost-exclusively breastfed at this point. It is normal for baby to keep breastmilk as the primary part of his diet up until 18 months or even longer. An example of a nice gradual increase in solids would be 25% solids at 12 months, 50% solids at 18 months, and 80% solids at 24 months

Some children take a little longer to begin taking solids well. Some of them have food sensitivities and this may be their body’s way of protecting them until their digestive system can handle more. Others are late teethers or have a lot of difficulty with teething pain. At this point there is NOTHING that your milk lacks that your child needs, with the possible exception of enough iron. As long as his iron levels are within acceptable levels and when he does eat you are offering him foods naturally rich in iron, then you have plenty of time before you need to worry about the amount of solids he’s getting

All you need to do is to continue to offer foods. Don’t worry if he’s not interested or takes very small amounts. Your only true responsibility is what you offer, when you offer it and how you offer it, not whether or not he eats it. That has to be up to him. Trying to force, coax, or cajole your child into eating is never recommended. Continue to nurse on demand, day and night, and trust your child to increase the solids when he’s ready. As baby slowly moves into eating more solids, your milk will fill any nutritional gaps nicely

I second eating your food in front of him. I employed this approach for a while with my DC and it helped.

Other things that worked, putting lunch in a tub, DC in pushchair and go for a walk. Looking around seemed to distract.

Small portions can seem less daunting.

Also, does he like porridge? It's my go to filler upper especially if bedtime is looming and you know they need to eat. Might help him to drop some feeds too.

Oh something that might be helpful too, my DC was very inconsistent with weaning. If they were teething or poorly they'd revert back to a purely milk diet and then slowly increase solids again once better. So don't worry or stress if the amount of solids goes up and down here and there.

Can his chair be brought to the table where you eat (remove the tray bit?)

He might want to be a bit more grown up!

I'd put a few things in reach in the table and see what he does, he might curious.

It's hard but try not to look at him while your eating (nobody likes that) and just chat with out menitioning food - read a book of that helps like PP said a bit of distraction

My eldest son (now 4) is a very picky eater and always has been, it can be quite stressful. I really recommend joining the facebook group Parenting Picky Eaters. It's run by two feeding consultants with lots of experience. They answer any questions you have and it's a really supportive group, full of useful info. It's been a lifesaver for us.

Kellymom is a fabulous site in general but I’ve seen this statistic before and I think it’s not true across the board We like to see breastmilk making up the majority (around 75%) of baby’s diet at 12 months.

The paediatrician we saw for DSs poor growth was of the opinion that 9-12m they should be about 50:50 - she said she sees a lot of kids on the ‘food is for fun until they are one’ idea and that it’s not always best. Ds was losing weight hand over fist until we put him on more solids (not fruit, specific higher fat things) And reduced bf considerably.

Obviously all kids are different and maybe some people have mega dense BM, but we certainly found that 75% at 12m was way, way too much for us.