Dp not sharing any housework at all because I am on maternity

[Pumkins]

Title says it all really and I am puzzled.

Before ot seems I slag him off out dc is now 10 weeks old, and he is a good dad. Wants to spend time with dd and has her few hours on his days off so I can go take care of my horse baby free and will take over a bit in the evening too + we started sharing night feeds so both of us can get a decent sleep (she only wakes 2 or 3 times).
However although I did agree it was easier for me to do more of the housework while he works, he's really taken a seat back lately. He stopped helping at all with any sterilising or even putting his dishes away. I am picking up affer him - clothes, dishes, wrapers he didnt bother putting in the bin. I do absolutely everything and the last drop has hit me as I gave him a laundry basket so I could toss a few of his clothes in with mine or the baby's. That was my only request of I was going to do his washing (the reason why I didnt before is a long story that began with the phrase "I never asked you to do it").
Well there is a mount everest of clothes less than a meter away from said basket, amongst with again dishes and food packaging. I know he will be asking with puppy eyes for a wash to be done when he runs out of things to wear and I will lose my shit.
I have already asked him nicely twice to sort it out but it doesnt seem to sink in.
That and the fact that I was really poorly for a day or two and he thougjt that takong the baby off me for a bit was enough help given, I can always catch up on the house when I feel better right?

So I need advice. Am I making a mountain out of a mole hill? Been up since 4:30 obsessing over it. I pay my half of the bills and earn my own money. My maternity is to take care of the baby... feeling like I've been a little too nice about it and am getting a bum deal out of it now!

Maybe he's tired from looking after the baby and working full time?

My children are in their twenties now. These posts astound me. Presuming your husband works, including commute forty to fifty hours per week over five days. Do you really spend that much time looking after a baby? I agree, don't allow him to behave in a slovenly fashion in the house but surely you can fit in cooking, cleaning and laundry.

Some people haven't read my thread properly so I will clarify some points here:
I agreed to take on most (actually all) the housework because he works.
Neither of us really cooks, so we make batches together that we freeze or throw in the oven whatever takes our fancy.
I clean all dishes, do all the hoovering, sterilising, desinfecting, sweeping, bins sorting, tidying and insert any other relevant housechore here + do all the baby work so that when he has her (and yes, he wants to because he's always wanted to be a dad so why shouldn't he) everything is where he needs it, when he needs it down to the very last detail. And I don't mind.
And yes, I get a total of 4hrs... maybe 5hrs a week to drive to the yard throw a saddle on my horse and ride as quick as poss whilst he takes the little one to see his family (I have no family around). Yupedee yay.
I make sure he has his free time most evening to play his games (so no he does not take over all evening, actually just long enough for me to eat something and get the night feeds ready) and now that we are both happy with our sleep patter he goes once a week for a drink with his mates at night whilst I stay home with baby. I also makensure to be there as much as poss on hs days off so he can have a rest.

So no he is not useless, but yes I am moaning that there is a mountain of clothes mixed with empty bottles and biscuit packets less than a meter away from the basket because "I might wear that again" . As dementedpixie said, I don't need the extra work.

Anyway he has noticed my smacked arse face and I told him what was bothering me. And he's cool with it. Even threw away his rubbish.

Maternity leave is for taking care of your baby, not housework. Yes, you might find that you do slightly more because youre at home, but he should still be contributing on evenings and weekends.

Oops sorry, i should have read the whole thread.

Good update 👍

And yes, I get a total of 4hrs... maybe 5hrs a week to drive to the yard throw a saddle on my horse and ride as quick as poss whilst he takes the little one to see his family (I have no family around). Yupedee yay.

There’s no yupedee yay about it. 5 hours a week is shed loads of free time out of the house when your baby is 10 weeks old.

I read these threads and and it makes me laugh when what is expected of these men and what I did when I went back to work at 16 weeks and OH was a sahp.
Poor husband of yours.

To you this sounds like a hobby you can just leave aside for a year. To me it's a passion and lifestyle I have had since my childhood. We made it clear I would be back at it ASAP after the birth and we both agreed on it.
I was at it 20 hrs per week pre birth + riding until then. (I don't care if you disagree with that too) I waited to make sure he and baby bonded and any time the two of them spend together is quality time hebdoesn't need nore wants me there micromanaging how he does it.
We had a deal. End of and it is a fair one too since he gets between 5-10hrs a week to play his games and a night off too. Why should I feel blessed to get 5 hrs. It's his baby too isnt it?
And don't judge, sometimes the man (gasp) wanted the parenthood the most. Turns out science hasnt progressed far enough yet for them to birth a child yet.

@Lweji
Can you read the thread properly then elaborate? I am genuinly intrigued.

I meant some of the posters here. Not you, OP.

It's as if the poor husband can't possibly be expected to care for the baby alone more than a couple of hours, and the mother shouldn't be away for more than 5 min.
Of course you deserve your 5 hours to do your thing. We all need to keep our identities after parenthood, ffs.

Thank you!
I thought it was sarcasm but after some of the judgemental comments I recieved here I wasn't sure

PotteringAlong still hasn't told us whether or not she thinks it's fine for your to leave his cups and plates lying around, wrappers he's used not in the bin, his laundry jumbled up with rubbish at the side of the laundry bin. Presumably she thinks that all perfectly ok because you get to go out without your baby for 5 hours pw.

He has a part time job. You have a full time job. He should definitely be doing more.

Thanks @ibicus
Me and OH have talked and we sorted it. He actually agrees with my complaint so ...we cool!

No, I don’t think it’s ok at all. I do think life is not as bad as the op seems to think it is, definitely not to have been obsessing over since 4am, and maybe standing back with a little perspective is no bad thing.

Better to obsess now than look back in 20 years and wonder where her life went.

@PotteringAlong
I actually agree with you there. It wasnt worth obsessing over. As I was just getting over my illness the tiredness got to me there!