Mum guilt

[catkin02]

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and not having the best of times with my back and hips.

I also have a 22 month old son. We get out everyday up until a couple of weeks ago where I get to Wednesday and feel like my back and hips have had enough.

We do activities every Monday and Tuesday morning and Wednesday is normally some shopping and lunch up the high street but I can't bring myself to do that at the mo - the thought of lifting him in a shopping trolley or getting his buggy out the boot makes me wince.

It doesn't help my in laws have already felt the need to have a chat with me about getting out the house post delivery. I had a csection last time with various complications and a poorly baby and I really took some stick 12 days post partum because I didn't go to their street party. For them to have 'that chat' with me already hasn't helped the guilt.

Tomorrow and Friday are covered, I have extra hands so will make the most of it.

Guiltastic

Basically I feel really guilty for staying in today.

Don't feel bad for staying in. I have a toddler and 3 month old. We haven't gone out everyday. Can you do crafts for a bit or painting? Or build a den that they can sit and play in while you rest a bit.
Your in-laws shouldn't be making you feel bad.

Thank you for the reply Rach. Yes I've got a Disney film on, all the crafts out, bought more crafts from amazon and all the toys he hasn't seen in a while. Seems occupied whilst I sit my hip on hot water bottle. It does help it's raining here.

I've told inlaws I'm not going to beat myself up (totes am) if I have days in the house when the baby is born. There response was - oh but you'll have the summer, won't that be nice. Just because they have ants in their pants and can't sit still.

Umm, no you can't go to the street party or be rushed through to recovery just for them.

This is your baby and your health. I would be distancing myself from the in laws and telling them now that you will not be doing anything at all for the first six weeks apart from bonding with your new baby and establishing feeding patterns and spending time together as a family. You will call them when you are ready for visitors and will let them know when you are well enough for outings.

You need to look after your back and hips, you still have a month to go. So no guilt, no stress, choose everything that is easy for you. Soft play areas, films, crafts, muddy play in the garden, reading. You need to rest soon you will have two, so ds needs to make some adjustments, better he starts now.

Seriously your in laws need to stop. Be kind but assertive.

I have a 13mth old and 4months pregnant and even before I fell pregnant again I don't go out everyday. I'm only starting to make more effort to go out more now but certainly don't feel bad when we bunker down at home some days. I play on having a while where I find my feet when new baby is here and have no plans at all on rushing out.

Don't feel bad take care of your hip and let lo play at home. He honestly won't mind