Feeling very sad

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

My DD is nearly 8 months old and in 1week 4 days I have to go back to work- im dreading it. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my job (before baby) and I work with lovely people but I love my baby more and the thought of being apart from her has me in bits (literally I’m crying every night recently). Not helped that I haven’t given up breast feeding yet and know the next week I need to stop and watch her claw at my tops whilst crying. I’m so sad and just want to rewind back the last 8 months and relive it over and over again!
Any words of wisdom out there in MN land....?

It's tough . I've gone back with both my dc but I started PT that had to go FT. It helped building up to it.

My dd's have both had an amazing CM who is like family and that has really helped too. They have both loved going.

Keep bf at night? I kept a feed for dd1 that was purely for me but it helped also.

I didn’t go back until DD was 13 months but from around d 8/9months she was only feeding morning and evening. You could still do that with her, you don’t have to stop. By this point your supply will adjust to feeding a couple of times a day without any issues.

Thank you. Will it be possible to just feed at night without needing to express out in the day due to “exploding” boobs?

I have gone back to work 4 times now and it's tough. My friend has just gone back to work with her first DC who is only 5mths. She was very upset too but once your back and in a routine it will all slot into place. You will very quickly get back into work mode and your little one will enjoy nursery although appreciate you may be using other childcare. Don't force the breastfeeding issue. I still breastfed my last one in the morning and before bed when I went back to work. It's nice for mommy and DC. you will be fine. Relax and enjoy the time you have left.

From memory yes. Your supply adjusts

They will be a bit uncomfortable but will adjust. I did evening feed at 7pm but stop about a month after I went back to work when I felt ready.

I went back when both mine were 6 months old, and I carried on feeding them morning and night for a good while. I never expressed at work- your supply will adjust very quickly, as a PP said.

Generally, returning to work can be hard, you have my sympathies. For me, the first week was amazing- hot drinks and adult conversation- but the second week was hard, when I realised this was it, iyswim. Good luck.

Yes it is definitely possible. Will just take a few days to adjust. I am going back myself in two weeks and dreading it. But plan to keep the morning and night feed. This is my third baby and I kept up feeding on DC2 after I went back for about 3 months. It came to a natural end then but I am sure you could keep it going longer if you wanted.
It is so tough, but I think sometimes the dread of it is worse than the actual going back! Good luck!

Start dropping feeds now - your body needs to be 3-5 days to adjust each time . I went back at 6 months with one of mine and just swapped the 2 day feeds for bottles, still breastfed morning, bedtime and in the night.

I went back after 5 months with DD and 6 months with DS - going back 4 days a week. Within 5 years I was working full time.

I wept each time I went back and felt so guilty. A lot of juggling but a lot of joy too. But within years my friends were jealously talking about my luck in having such a rewarding career. Now both will be gone to university in 2 years and I'm very glad to have such an interesting life. And my DD said to her Dad 'when I grow up I want to be like mummy have lots of friends, be a boss at work and be a lovely mummy'.

My children respect me for who I am. And I'm genuinely very close to both of them.

So trying to drop the Day feeds today- tears and desperately turning into my chest...such guilt but will perserver

Are you trying to drop all day feeds in one go or just offering a bottle /cup/snack for one feed?

Trying to drop feeds the hours I’ll be at work.
So today she breastfed upon wake up, then breakfast, then a mid morning bottle (she drank 5oz), lunch and then an afternoon bottle (this one she barely touched, maybe 1.5oz before falling asleep)- will offer again on waking up, 5pm she’ll have dinner and then I’ll breast feed her after bath- does that sound enough formula?

I've found the anticipation is worse than the actuality.

Your boobs will naturally settle into what she needs so you should be able to feed morning and night. I did with my daughter.

I would start with just swapping the morning feed, give your body and a few days to get used to that, then swap the afternoon feed.

After a week or two of banging boobs, all will calm down. You may need to pump a bit at work for comfort. You may need breast pads again to conceal leakage. You may need to prepare for the phenomenon of reverse cycling where the baby bfs a lot at night for a bit. It will be okay.