Three's a crowd??

[EclecticDream]

I have DS 2 yrs and DD 1 yr (planned close age gap) and they are fabulous together. They giggle at each other all the time and play nicely. I bloody love them and feel so lucky that they like each other.

I always wanted three children though but now I'm feeling worried that the third would be left out or would upset the dynamic.

DH and I are both from families of 3 but he's all boys and I'm all girls, the age differences are very different (eldest in both families are a lot older), my DM had BPD when we were children and we were placed into the care of our grandparents... so very different dynamics anyway!

Any advice? Is it worth the risk for my longed for third? Or stick with my perfect two?

I’m a middle child and loved it, parents very strict with eldest... I had it a lot easier!!

We’ve had two and sometimes I regret we didn’t have a 3rd, although financially it would have killed us.

I have 3- wish i had stopped at 2! They are all lovely in any combination of 2 of them, but the 3 of them together are very very hard work.

I wouldn't want to start trying for a third until the end of the year/start of 2019 so it gives a bit of time to talk myself into or out of it.

It's so mixed...

Are most of the "hell no" responses from single sex 3s?

Clutching at straws!

I am the youngest of 3 girls (women now obviously) and there is a 6 yr gap in total between me and my oldest sister (but 7 academic yrs) and 4 yrs between me and the middle (but 5 academic yrs).

As kids I tended to be co-opted by one or other of them in their conflicts and then when eldest left home for uni, the middle one was old enough to go and stay with her and I found that hard but was much closer to older one with distance. But we always all got on for the most part.

We are now, all three of us, incredibly close. I spend more time with them than anyone else, separately and together, there is rarely any conflict, no jealousy and it all just works. If I could have 3 I would.

If you want 3, have 3!

I'm one of 4, dh is one of 3. We have 3. My sister has 3. dh's brother has 3. I've never seen this 'middle child syndrome'.
I love the fact that when they were growing up, there was always another one for the one left behind to play with, when one went (to cubs / swimming / school residential / a friend's house / whatever).

Oh one family is b/g/b....... mine was b/g/g/g..... others .... g/g/g.......b/g/g........g/g/b So all different.

I have three and of course they’re lovely but the world seems to think all families are 4 (two adults two dc) which is frustrating at times.

We have three girls 22 months between each. Grown up now 26, 24 & 22. They played beautifully together when they were children. They did have their moments but they were few and far between. The younger two looked up to the eldest. The older two looked after the youngest. They are all very independent individual characters but they also share lots interests and take part in sports together. They occasionally go on holiday together. They are the best of friends. It makes me so happy. I know they will always support each other. Three definitely worked for us. I would recommend it OP. Especially if you have a small age gap. Whatever you choose to do will be right for your family.

Ideally, if we're lucky enough, the third would be born when DS turns 4 and just before DD turns 3. So there'd be a bit of an age gap.

Still pretty close in age eclectic. Lovely in fact !

DS will be 20 months when g/g twins arrive. We wanted two and a small gap - life decided differently!

Both DH and I are one of 3 and deep down I would have considered a third, but in reality we probably wouldn't have due to money/space/work.

We didn't get to decide and it's somewhat wonderful!!

If I were you, I'd go for it. Just keep in mind it could be twins!! (We had no history or other factors).

@willisurvive3under2 you will survive. A friend of mine had B/G twins when her daughter was 16 months old... it's equal parts manic and wonderful. They're a cracking little pack of monkeys.

I have 3, two boys and a girl, with 3 year gaps between them all. They fight and scrap like all other kids but no major issues apart from the middle one with some jealousy problems towards the youngest.
I don't regret having 3. It's hard work but also beautiful.
You said your family is not complete. That's how I felt after 2 so you have answered your own question 😊