Extreme tantrums and 2 year molars

[User24689]

Hello all.

DD is 2.5. She has always been strong willed and has always liked a good tantrum but up until now her tantrums had a gradual build up and clear warning signs meaning that there was often time to divert her. She would also calm down within a reasonable time frame and be back to normal afterwards.

This past month, wow. She is just completely unmanageable. She is also cutting molars and I'm wondering if the two are related. We're racking up 5-6 major tantrums a day and her daycare (she goes 3 days a week) are struggling too. Here are a few examples from today:

1. Didn't want to put her shoes on to leave daycare. I explained calmly and firmly that she had to wear shoes. She went immediately from "I don't want to wear shoes" to a bloodcurdling scream and repetition of the phrase "no shoes no shoes". I eventually managed to console her by hugging her really tightly while daycare worker put her shoes on.
2. Got to car and she asked for a drink. I had brought the 'wrong' water bottle from home and she screamed " blue water bottle" repeatedly for the whole 15 minute drive. I thought she was going to be sick. She was quivering when we arrived.
3. Didn't want to get in bath. Had to, as covered in pen and dirt. Same again, just straight from 0 to hysterical. I had to hold her in the bath while DH washed her.

We seem to hit a new tantrum every half an hour at the moment and I'm exhausted. I also have a 4 month old that doesn't sleep.

Does Anyone have any experience of tantrums suddenly taking off at this age, is it a developmental stage? She has 2/4 molars at the moment, both bottom. One of those is only partly through and the gum is swollen. I'm giving her Nurofen morning and night. She says it hurts but only when I ask her, she hasn't ever told me that it hurts voluntarily. Please someone tell me they go back to normal when these teeth are through!!

Hi all. I posted this last week but didn't receive any replies so hope no one minds me giving it a bump.

I've had such a terrible night with DD. I'm still awake with her now at 10pm and DS is due to wake up for his first of many night feeds any moment.

She has screamed and screamed tonight whenever I've tried to leave the room. Bedtime was always one thing she was really easy with. She has been hysterical this evening and she can't explain why. DH was really firm with her/ repeatedly returned her to bed and it made her worse. So now he's pissed off with me for being soft.

At daycare pickup they told me they had several issues with her today and described it as a 'bad day,' which is the first time that's happened. I'm just so worried about her and so sad. :(

I have no advice but bumping as we are going through similar with our almost 2 year old. She also had a tantrum today because DH gave her a pink water bottle and not the purple one. Her gums are ask swollen where her molars will come through so maybe there is a link.
I have seen a book recommended on here called “how to talk so that children listen” which I ordered yesterday.
Good luck OP, let me know if you find something that works!

Thanks for your reply! That's the kind of thing our DD has flown off the handle for since she turned 2 really. It's the same now but the frequency and intensity has ramped right up lately. She also keeps telling me she feels sad :( We had a lovely day at the beach yesterday and she was curled in my lap at the end saying she felt sad.

She isn't sleeping well either so could be tiredness plus teeth.

The only thing we have found to help is taking a really gentle approach and not getting angry but hugging her really hard when she kicks off.

Teething is definitely a trigger for our DD. Ibuprofen is the only thing that heads off the tantrums. We watch her like a hawk, and as soon as he's behaviour shifts, if this is accompanied by drooling and/or fingers in the mouth we give a dose.

Recently her behaviour has gotten harder. She was ill a few weeks ago and hasn't been 100% since. Her temperature is randomly spiking. When it spikes she either has a tantrum, or if it goes v high she gets withdrawn. I am now wondering if she has something chronic going on, like ear ache or tonsillitis. I had chronic tonsillitis as a kid.

Oh and there are episodes where she is definitely just being a pain in the arse and pushing boundaries. We use the thinking step, but if she deliberately hurts someone, deliberately throws stuff at the telly or jumps off the arm of the sofa, she goes straight to her room. Have tried all other gentler options. They either don't work or stopped working. She only really responds to v strict mummy.

I really have no advice as my dd isn't 2 yet but she does love to throw herself on the floor and scream. I have seen a book called the whole brain child recommended. I've bought it myself but not read it yet.