Swearing

[FineAsWeAre]

Just interested in people’s views really - do you swear in front of your kids and do you let them swear? I was grounded for it as a child and I try to watch my language in front of my son but he knows a few words although doesn’t use them. I’ve gone down the road of it being ok in some situations (he hears a lot at football so when people are very emotional etc) but that he’s not to ever swear at someone else or at school. I’ve never heard him do it but I don’t want to make a big deal of it. A 3 year old at work today said “fuck off you stupid bastard” to me today and to me that wouldn’t be acceptable but would it in your house?

No one swears in front of the children in our house (or even very much when they aren’t there).

And no, I would not allow them to swear in front of me.

we swear infront of ours, but they know they are adult words and not allowed to say them untill they understand why. I have no issue with swearing, but I use it respectfully and know my audience when I use bad language. I expect to teach my children the same

Swearing is childish and loses respect. Part of growing up is to use your brain and learn self expression, is what I tell my DC.

I don’t swear in front of my dcs. Never have done!

I think it’s horrible.

We both had total sailor mouths before DS was born but we don’t swear in front of Him now and have a play with the most creative new swears! ‘Oh for sofa blanket’ for example! On the occasion someone does swear in front of him we (in a jokey way) tell them off. DS is at the stage of repeating everything he hears and I do not want him swearing. Nor would I find it acceptable for a child to swear

the thing is, our eldest has had it that other children say these words in school, Isn't it better that they know the words and not to say them, rather then them be "new" to them as they get older. It's naive to think they will go through childhood not hearing them at all, especially as they get older, by taking out the "you must not say these words" and disgust in them makes it less likely for them to say then for impact?!

You only have to let slip once and it becomes their favourite word and they're able to say it clear as day! 😂 My DC know they aren't allowed to swear and when they are small it's ignored and it stops 😊

Not swearing in front of my children isn’t about protecting their innocence. It’s modelling good behaviour. I do not swear at work (much), I do not swear in front of certain people out of respect!

yes exactly, but you had to learn not to use swearing around certain people and situations out of respect. It has to be taught.

I think my daughter was in her 20s before she heard either of us swear.

I don't swear in front of DS2 because he'd repeat every single word. I swear in front of DD because she'd never repeat it.

I can’t see any situation where I need to swear in front of my dcs in order to teach them. My mum didn’t swear in front of me....

I try not to. I have a couple of times, over the years. To which ds's told me off. And told Dh as soon as he got home!!

I don't think it's that bad, for them to hear a very very occasional swear word.

This thread is clearly not RL.
On MN no one swears.
In RL most people swear frequently.
I actually don't. But statistically, across the whole UK population, the % is quite high.

swearing

9 put if 10 people swear daily.
90% of the population?

No. Not according to MN!
0.01% of the MN population.
Apparently.

fallenangel so true! I opened the fridge door and a tub of opened blueberries fell out. Ds(2) came for a look then walked away, after picking them all up I stood up and hit my head on the corner of the open fridge door. A very quiet 'fuck' slipped out as tears spurted out of my eyes. Ds appeared instantly asking why I said 'fug'. He's been fugging on and off for a week now!
I'd be horrified to hear a 3 year old say what you heard though.

I swear a lot. Just never in front of the dcs. I’ve amazed myself but I said from day one I would not swear and I havent.

I don't swear in front of DC. I also work with kids, so wouldn't swear at work either. I swear very rarely.

I would tell my 5 year old off for swearing.

If she was a teenager and used it without insulting anyone eg "that show was shit" I wouldn't mind.

Yup. Sweary here.

Kids know these are adult words and if they're stupid enough to use them not to get caught by an adult.

Has worked so far but DD1 has just started working with me so we'll see.....

I think there is a time and a place.If you stub your toe in the dark or burn yourself or some kamikaze driver almost takes you out, then, honestly, "blimey" just ain't gonna do it.
I don't particularly ban my children because I know there is no point. My parents were tremendously strict with language and my brothers and I were so frustrated we used to open the window and scream random swear words just to let it out.
I try not to swear too much in front of them and certainly never use the c word at home as I find it distasteful, but sometimes if I'm rushing around in my hot kitchen my language can get rather colourful.... As I am bilingual, though, I tend to swear more in my mother tongue so they don't really understand it anyway 😁

I have always tried to drum it into their heads when it is acceptable to swear and when it isn't. In front of me, in front of friends who don't mind? Ok. In front of older relatives, strangers, teachers, cops, vicars, nuns or in your future workplace: not cool. And never in the context of insulting others, I don't really like that.
Ultimately kids will grow up to do exactly what they want, so I only insist on them knowing there is a time and a place. Even my very strict mother saw my point when she called me out for it and now just laughs it off. In the end they are just a word. If we make a big deal of it they only like it MORE... 😉

I try not to swear in front of DD (11Yo). Not going to claim 100% victory as in more recent years I did on one occasion drop the F bomb out of sheer frustration.

However DD doesn’t swear and knows that swearing is not ok as a child. She does however know pretty much all the swear words from the school playground (starting in Junior school!) but she tells me it’s not shocking any more and she won’t repeat them

I’ve told her that should she ever swear, to make sure she keeps it just between her and her friends, that swearing in front of adults, teachers, grandparents etc is not ok.

I’d say it’s more about teaching them to respect their audience appropriately than teaching them not to swear as that’s more realistic.

I was only have this conversation the other day with a friend. My parents never swore in front of me I overheard them arguing once when I was 16 and my mum swore I couldn't believe it. Now I feel like it's changing and that people do swear in front of their children. My friend was saying her DD has started to say oh fuck because she heard her dad say it watching football. They are ignoring her hoping she will stop . My DD is only 10 months but I am trying to be more aware of what I say not a massive swearer and still never in front of parents