1 month old sleeping issues

[owltrousers]

I have a 1 month old DS, he was sleeping beautifully at night but lately he's becoming more unsettled, he's always been slightly unsettled with day time sleeping and will sometimes be awake for 3-4 hours at a time.

Day or night he follows the same kind of pattern - he wakes, has his nappy changed and then I feed him which will send him off to sleep again (he's winded in the middle - he's a very windy baby, mostly bottom wind. We give him gripe water and infacol for the wind, as it was impossible to bring up before we did and he would suffer terribly in the evenings.) he falls into a deep sleep at this point so I pop him back in his moses basket. 2 seconds later and he's writhing around, bringing his legs up, grunting and screwing up his face. Sometimes he will fart at this point, sometimes poop, sometimes nothing. Most of the time this wakes him up and I have a really hard time soothing him and getting him down again. As soon as he's in my arms all the writhing and grunting behaviour stops, its just that moment his head touches the moses basket.

The only place he ever seems to drift off easily and sleep soundly is in the sling, but I am hesitant to use it too much in case I create bad habits.

Any ideas?

Hi, my DD was exactly the same as this at 1 month I think they tend to go through a couple of growth spurts.. have you ruled out reflux as my DD was put on gaviscon around this age as she was getting runny eyes and griping/grizzly a lot. If you ruled this out I found putting them on their side in swaddle for a nap was great for sleeping and also a white noise app that blurred out other sounds good luck and it gets easier

Also you cannot get them into bad habits at this age..please ignore anyone who says you can I say anything that works well in getting a baby to sleep is a plus and gives you time for a cuppa 😉😉

@mummmyj Thank you

I'm not sure about reflux, mainly because he doesn't actually cry much... I always thought one of the symptoms was excessive crying. DS's cousin had reflux and he was red in the face crying ALL the time, where as DS is pretty chilled, just unsettled. Do you think its worth mentioning at the 6 week appointment with our GP?

It’s probably not a medical thing, just a 4th trimester thing. Feeling separate from you is unfamiliar and scary so he wakes and yells. You could try warming the Moses basket with a hot water bottle first, or putting something in there that smells of you - sometimes that helps.

(You won’t get him into bad habits at one month old, don’t worry!)

4th trimester - sarahockwell-smith.com/2012/11/04/the-fourth-trimester-aka-why-your-newborn-baby-is-only-happy-in-your-arms/

Thanks @53rdWay thats interesting reading and quite reassuring. Only problem is the sling gives me such a bad back :(

To be honest OP, the first 12 months of a child's life is like a rollercoaster. You have to understand they're getting used to being outside your tummy, they're growing, they're teething. So if a baby sleeps through the night at 6 weeks, don't expect them to sleep through the night at 8 weeks or 9.

Every baby is different and I agree with previous poster don't listen to people who say my baby slept through at 2 weeks, well that's just great but that may not be the case for you OP.

You really just need to get on with it and just listen to your baby and get to know him/her It's a journey, all the best OP

Definitely mention at your 6 week appointment as hv are not the most supportive these days!! But they will say all babies are different an so on!! An know what you mean about the sling it hurts badly after an hour or so but I found swaddling in a cover after laying it on me for 5 mins helped my DD an please don't believe the words.. just get on with it either if you need help this is what forums like this are for and also older women family members are great for tips my mum swaddled my DD first time as didn't even cross my mind😀😀

And my DD didn't cry excessively with reflux just watery eyes and off her milk abit and unsettled if she wasn't upright x

Thanks @mummmyj ! when you say watery eyes do you mean when your DD had the acid in her throat it made her eyes water? I noticed the other day when DS was crying he had two actual tears come out - it surprised me as I didn't think they could cry tears yet!

My DS is a month old and really very similar. He's sleeping on me right now (and being very cute with it) because every time i put him down in his basket he wakes up, thrashes his limbs around and generally upsets himself. I thought it was wind too, he's been asleep an hour and I've tried to put him down twice without success, but as soon as i pick him up and cuddle him, he right goes back to sleep. he's even snoring right now. So i think he just wants to cuddle.

tbh i'm just going with it and enjoying it for now, as much as is practical. i'm sure it wont be forever, and thankfully he has slept in his basket ok at night so far. it's hard to resist cuddling him anyway! if this is where he wants to be, then thats fine by me. the way i see it, there's not much i could be doing that's more important than caring for him at the moment, and the time is going to come around very quickly that he has better things to do than spend the day snuggled up with his mummy. It's not always practical, god knows I could do with getting some housework and cooking done, but it will all be there later I'm sure. It does feel very indulgent, but I'm never getting these first few weeks again, so I'm doing what everyone tells me to and enjoying it.

I've never met a 1 month old without sleeping issues😂 OP, their sleep and patterns and needs will change drastically week on week for the next year or more. You just have to react and adjust along with them.

Sounds normal and very much like my DC at that age. Safe cosleeping and slings were my saviour. As others have suggested google 4th trimester. This too shall pass.

I also dont think grunting and writhing is always painful wind (although my mother seems to think any baby movement is wind). I think it’s just sometimes them getting used to the sensation of milk digesting or the feeling of being about to poo or pass wind. It’s all strange and new to them still.

Thanks everyone. I'm a FTM so hard to know whats 'normal' and what to worry about! Some helpful advice however :)

DD2 is 4 weeks old and we have similar in the evenings. We've found that she prefers to be swaddled in the Moses basket or pram - sleeps through the night unswaddled in the sleepyhead.

But for the evening fussiness, I'm beginning to just let her sleep on me. She also has a bit of a cold at the moment, so just wants a bit more contact and cuddles, and frankly, for a peaceful evening I'll do whatever it takes!

The squirming and grunting and gurning makes you feel completely helpless doesn't it? We're programmed to want to fix whatever is making them uncomfortable, but as a PP says, I think it's just them getting used to what their body feels like.

Does he poo everyday? DD has been pooing every 3-4 days, which I'm sure doesn't help!

This is normal for a 4 week old naby, they just want to be close to you. Also there’s a developmental leap around now which makes them cranky and clingy as their brain changes and they feel disoriented.