SAHM what do you do during the day?

[SamanthaH92]

As the title says, what do you do with your little ones during the day? We just play and go for a little walk. My DD is starting to look bored. We can't go to the local parks as they have been vandalised, broken glass everywhere, equipment set fire to, dog muck everywhere and used condoms scatter the park. We have 3 local parks all like this, i have complained to the council multiple times. I don't drive and there isnt much we can do here. What do you mums that don't drive do for a day out?

Have you got any local baby and toddler groups? Check local churches, we have lots here and you don’t have to be religious to attend.

There is a few but i am not a fan of them sort of groups. Been to a few and everyone always seems so clicky x

Try a website called the imagination tree, there are lots of ideas of activities on there.

Also Pinterest, just search for activities for your child’s age.

Depends where you live , we go to a Mum and toddler group 4 afternoons a week , the library is always a hit with my little one and we have a local museum that we go to, we do go on the bus a lot to places a bit further away.

Toddler gym at local sports centre?
Library story time?
Toddler dance lessons?
Maybe try different toddler groups, contact organiser beforehand and say you’re new? If you’re youmgiive it a bit longer you might feel differently.
Swimming.

I have older ones as well so have a school run to do meaning we are up and out by 8.10. After this we go to a toddler group or to the beach or park. If we’re at home in the morning I do a specific activity with her eg messy play or cooking. She still naps in the afternoon so I get most of my jobs done then. Then school run again. After that she plays with her toys again unless we go out somewhere. The school run does help to break the day up a bit, I remember when the older ones were little the days felt endless.

Do you have a library nearby? They offer good groups and they’re usually free too which is a bonus.

Do you have any friends with similarly aged children? Just meeting other people can provide a change of scene or make playing at home feel a bit different.

Play dough, lego/duplo, playmobil, blocks, drawing, junk modelling, kitchen disco, books nursery rhymes, drawing, chalks, orchard toy games, baking, dinosaurs, my little pony, cars.....

No library near by that i know off. No, no friends with toddlers a similar age. Its always just me and her from 7am till 6:30pm x

When mine was little I always had a routine that I set of stuck too.
Monday am swimming
Pm crafts
Tuesday library
Pm walk
Wednesday museum or gallery
Pm baking
Thursday park
Pm reading, toys
Friday soft play
Pm lunch out
Saturday, picnic or outside wet play
Sunday , films and day at home.
If we were on our own we did this.

Is she at an age where she can join a activity e.g tumble tots, baby ballet ect?

I know you mention you don't like the mum and baby groups, but maybe you should try again to give your little one a chance to socialise with other babies? They really do love it. Otherwise could you try things like Nct coffee mornings, local swimming pool etc. Also try downloading an app like Hoop which tells you what local baby events are going on in your area every day.

In that case I would try to break up your day with activities rather than just free play (still free play in between) and persevere with the groups. Some groups can be cliquey and they can be hard to go to alone but I always take the view that I go for the dc and talking to anyone is a bonus! So I might go and spend the whole time sat on the floor playing with dd whilst the other mums chat but at least we’ve had a change of scene and she’s interacted with other children. I also make a point of smiling and saying hello to people, I’ve got to know quite a few people just from going to the same group every week and gradually upping the conversation each week.

I used to take dd to the park, realise that's not an option for you locally but sometimes we'd get the train or bus (which she loved doing) and go to a park or somewhere with nice walks further away.

Baby and toddler groups. I didn't really get involved much with other parents, mainly took the chance to sit with a coffee and watch dd or play with her. Or in some cases get involved in the activities depending what they were.

Swimming - didn't do this often.

Dd loved trains so we'd go somewhere we could watch them going down the tracks.

Walks around the streets, looking out for insects and plants and stones and sticks.

I also tried to break up the day. So we'd do something like a playgroup or a walk in the morning. Then come home and have lunch. Then do something at home in the afternoon. Depends on the age of your dd as to what that could be. I got ideas from the internet and things I saw at playgroups and tried to recreate them at home. Even if it only used up half an hour, dd enjoyed it and it would break up the day. Things like, playing with shredded paper, glueing things, sensory baskets, playing with bubbles (I got a cheap bubble machine so I didn't have to blow them)..... really, really depends on age though.

That is a long run to be on your own with a child with nowhere to go. I’d definitey give the baby groups a go. You have nothing to lose! Are you sure it’s cliquey and not just most people know each other because they go all the time! You need to put the time in.

When I didn’t have the car I found it harder but with just one child I found getting the bus and train places fairly easy. No way could I stay in all day I had to get out every day or I was miserable

Yes i am starting to feel very miserable about it and also about the area we live in. Not sure if its hormones too. I don't have many friends either and none are really intrested now I've had a child x

I would also recommend giving the groups another try. When I moved here I knew absolutely nobody and fell pregnant before I really made a network. DS is 8.5 months old now, and I still only really know people from toddler groups - at least we have babies in common, it makes conversation slightly easier!

DS and I only do two things outside the house - one toddler group, and a singing group at the library - but it has helped. The toddler group did seem cliquey at first, but a couple of weeks after I started going, a mum I recognised from singing came along and her DS is a similar age to mine, so we chat a bit. We're both more introverted/shy and I don't imagine us being besties in a couple of years, but it's nice. It also made singing (where no adults really interact, it's singing then home) a bit nicer to know she's there as a friendly familiar face I'm comfortable saying hi to!

I may give them another go. Think i am just feeling quite down today about it all (the area and not having many adults apart from family to communicate with). Thank you for your advice ladies xx

I totally take my hat off to you being one on one all that time . I have the attention span of a goldfish so can only do an hour max indoors with my toddler
I am/was dead against going to Mum groups but then I realised that loads of other mums were hating them too so sort of clung onto them
I now meet up with them a few times a week. It does pass the time and you can talk /rant/moan/gossip with them
You're doing a really good job x

OP I used to go to mother and baby/toddler groups with my children when their were small and at a few no one talked to me. I didn't care though, they were just something to do.