Anyone else's child/ren put them under pressure to have another baby?

[becaroo]

Last night my ds who will be 4 in June said...
"Can I have a baby brother?"
He has never mentioned anything like this before.
I have recently had to terminate a much wanted pregnancy for health reasons so I was incredibly upset by this.
In an ideal world I would now be 13 weeks pregnant and shouting it from the rooftops...the reality is that I am not pregnant, still bleeding and feeling very ill and unhappy.
I am now convinced that my ds is somehow lonely or unhappy - why else would he say that?
I would appreciate some advice on how to
a) answer his question in an honest way that he can understand &
b) get over the loss of my baby and move on.

Sorry to hear about your loss.

It's pretty common for children to ask for baby brothers and sisters, and it doesn't mean they're lonely or unhappy. Judging from the things that dd has said, it seems that they see other children with siblings and new babies, and think that everyone has them. It also seems that they start to want to feel more grown up, they don't want to be the "baby" any more, and they think that having a new baby would make them feel bigger and more important.

Dd is almost 6 and has been asking for a baby sister for ages - we just tell her that it's not going to happen. We don't dwell on it, and we try and keep it nice and light-hearted when she asks for a baby - saying she can have one when she's 25, or trying to think of all the not-so-nice things about babies with her, for instance, so that she doesn't feel she's missing out. You don't need to justify yourself, and you don't need to give him reasons unless you feel comfortable about doing so.

Oh Becaroo, I am so sorry to hear yuor news.
I too understand because I am similar.
Recently ds (3.3) said he wanted a sister ( like his cousin ds , who has a dd, who my ds adores)
I said, you have mummy and daddy.
No mummy, he said, its not enough.
I think it is not an uncommon thing for children to say.
It is becasue you are very sensitive, having been through something so traumatic, that it sounds, or that you are worrying about what he has said.

think this is obv affecting you more due to your situation, our dc's always ask for another baby and ds's friend is still pestering his mum despite four brothers already. I would try not to take it too much to heart (hard) if you can.

What you all say makes perfect sense....
I think I am a bit over sensitive about this issue at the moment - Didnt sleep a wink last night worrying about it and feeling miserable.
My dh is trying to be supportive but is wary of saying the wrong thing i think.
Thank you for your advice