Should I let them go on holiday?

[creativels]

My ex has asked if he can take our 2 children (12 &14) on holiday for 2 weeks during term time, they are going to Disney World in Florida and there are several reasons why they cannot go during summer holidays which I understand. I initially said absolutely not during school term however he has obtained permission from their school as it is a 'special holiday'; & he asked the school when the best time to take them was so not to interfere with exams/trips etc now he is asking for my written permission to take them but I am not sure whether to give it. He knows he needs my permission to take them abroad (and I need his) but I'm not happy about them missing school for 2 weeks. Advice please

To me disney esp Florida is a once in a lifetime experience for most people. Your ex has done everything right, Even the school think its special holiday and i think you will all regret it in the long run if you do not allow this to happen. Definitely worth missing two weeks of school. I really hope you allow your children to go it really is the most magical experience for children and they will treasure the memories forever.

Thank you, I do feel as I'm being unreasonable but I do worry about them missing school. I think I'm also a little annoyed as he first came to me & I said no so he then went to the school to ask them, now they've said it's ok. If the school had not given the ok should I still give my permission?

They won't wasn't Rio go for much longer. They're not in big exam years. School are being reasonable. Let them go. Strict catch up rules when they're back, but I would let them have this over free pass to do something amazing

Yeah maybe he went around it the wrong way but hes as much there parent as you are. Im guessing hes quite involved for the school to give him permission? Id give permission either way personally. Maybe you could speak to the teachers about giving them some extra homework if your really worried about missing school. Its a long flight and would give them something to do. But i really hope you let them go

He did say it was a once in a lifetime trip which I suppose is true, he wants to take them before they get too old to appreciate it all apparently and they have a 5 year old step sister. My ex did check with the school which were the best months (in terms of disruption) for them to go so I suppose he has at least taken that into account as they said May was def a no go due to exams, I suppose I just worry too much; he says he can't do summer holiday as he & his wife goes to see her family in Spain for 2 weeks; weather is too hot in Florida, hurricane season starts in August & his work is peak time during summer so I do understand. He originally wanted to take them for 3 weeks but after discussion he agreed that was too long out of school.

He has covered every angle to minimise disruption, just make their day op and say yes. And yes to homework on the plane

Why would you stop them? And what would they think of you if you did.

He has done the right thing I know that, I don't think I have any reason to say no except that it sets a precedent. Every year they(ex & his wife) go abroad in Europe for 2 weeks in spring & again in Autumn & I say no to them going as it is during term time, they went once abroad during term time & my ex wasn't given authorisation from the school & had to pay a fine although he said that he had informed the school (which I believe) and that just because they say no doesn't mean he can't take them and that the fine is just another way for local council to extort money as it doesn't go to the school funding!!

I wouldn’t be bothered about my kids missing school for two weeks if they were visiting somewhere unusual, or educational. Florida is a dire place and I don’t see the point in missing school for something so nothingy. Does it have to be Florida? There are theme parks all over the world that can be combined with other far more exciting opportunities. Also, would Disney be ‘magical’ for teenagers? Mine would have been a bit embarrassed.

I made them miss a holiday to Thailand beginning of last year (again out of school) and a holiday to Canaries as my ex's reasons weren't good enough imo to take them; but that was for a longer time than 2 weeks. He goes away a lot & always says they are welcome but I have to draw the line somewhere. I cannot dictate to him where he goes obviously so if he chooses to go to Florida then that's up to them. I agree that it should be educational but I can't agree to everything surely? Next year they're going to SA but again during term time, so I've said no.

I made them miss a holiday to Thailand beginning of last year (again out of school) and a holiday to Canaries as my ex's reasons weren't good enough imo to take them; but that was for a longer time than 2 weeks. He goes away a lot & always says they are welcome but I have to draw the line somewhere. I cannot dictate to him where he goes obviously so if he chooses to go to Florida then that's up to them. I agree that it should be educational but I can't agree to everything surely? Next year they're going to SA but again during term time, so I've said no.

I made them miss a holiday to Thailand beginning of last year (again out of school) as my ex's reasons weren't good enough imo to take them; but that was for a longer time than 2 weeks. He goes away a lot & always says they are welcome but I have to draw the line somewhere. I cannot dictate to him where he goes obviously so if he chooses to go to Florida then that's up to them. I agree that it should be educational but I can't agree to everything surely? Next year they're going to SA but again during term time, so I've said no.

I made them miss a holiday to Thailand beginning of last year (again out of school) as my ex's reasons weren't good enough imo to take them; but that was for a longer time than 2 weeks. He goes away a lot & always says they are welcome but I have to draw the line somewhere. I cannot dictate to him where he goes obviously so if he chooses to go to Florida then that's up to them. I agree that it should be educational but I can't agree to everything surely? Next year they're going to SA but again during term time, so I've said no.

Sorry something wrong with computer!didn't mean to post 4 x!!

I think your dc would like it. Let them go and have a lovely time. What you do with your holiday is just your business.

But after that you can't take them out of school.

Oh wait until next year for SA. Florida really is a shit holiday for teenagers.

But next year eldest will be 15 and will be doing GCSE's

He has put in a lot of effort to ensuring minimal disruption to the kids, regarding the time he’s going and gotten permission. They are not in vital school years. I think you’d be very u reasonable to say no. I have to take my child out of school for three weeks to go back to the UK and thank fully my EXH Sees the benefit and not a detriment to this and has given permission. I think you should give it and ASAP.

And I think long term, your continued refusal to allow the kids to go will come back on you. You’ve refused multiple very interesting trips. I think you’d be silly to refuse this one. Maybe he’s gone to the school because he’s frustrated that you always say no? I truly believe that experience trumps classrooms unless in an exam year.

I am a secondary school teacher and would take my own children out for a once in a lifetime holiday (shame I can't take myself out!) Just ask them to speak to their teachers and ask for some catch up work that can be done on the plane. Their teachers will be happy to give it (most kids don't ask!)

I would have no issue with this other than being a bit sad I wasn't going too. I went to Florida aged 19 and it was the most magical experience ever! Can't wait to take my two when they are older (and pay full whack😩)

You sound a very odd person.
He really needs to stop pandering to you.

I'm surprised the school is agreeing to 2 weeks out for a year 10, tbh. Disney is hardly educational, whereas there are plenty of other places that are. We took DD at 13 but I'm not sure she'd have enjoyed it much when older than that (except Animal Kingdom!)