Breast is best?

[MommaBee97]

So I'm pregnant with my second baby, another baby girl! With my first daughter I breastfed but was only successful for 3 weeks as my nipples started to bleed :( I'm thinking of breast feeding my second, however I don't know whether it was how my daughter latched that made me bleed, whether it was the breast pump that made me bleed or That I did something wrong? Am I wrong for thinking of not trying again and just going straight to formula or should I try first and hope for the best! (Also, I can't deal with the nightmare you get from midwives saying 'breast is best') Is there any tips on keeping your nipples from bleeding/cracking? What do you thinks better and easier? Breast or Bottle?

I think they both have their positives and negatives.

The purple nipple team (laniahon?) is good and nipple shields if needed.

Of course if would not be wrong to go straight to formula feeding but I know I would be anxious about paces feeded and all that jazz.

Breast is better for the baby, full stop. If you can breastfeed, you should at least try.

There is no need to tolerate bleeding nipples though (well... not for long anyway :) ). The local BF support groups, HVs, and various FB pages can all help and offer support. They should be able to send someone out to check your baby's latch and see if you're doing something wrong. They should also be able to recommend remedies for painful nipples - lanolin cream, cold or hot compress, and how to care for nipples. The website kellymom has loads of advice, and there are books about breastfeeding with lots of practical tips.

Some discomfort in the first weeks is normal, but it should not hurt for long. If you can make it through those first weeks, get the latch right, and get the supply established, you can feed for years and it's the most practical easy thing ever.

Good luck!

In addition to what PP have said - every baby is different, with DS1 I had lots of BFing issues due to tongue tie / thrush / latching issues, DS2 however has been really easy from the start with no pain whatsoever. It’s your choice of course but IMO definitely worth trying if you’re considering it anyway, what have you got to lose? At least you’ll know that you tried and any amount of breastmilk is better than none especially in the early days...
And there’s a lot of support and advice to be found if you do want to give it another go.

At least give bf a go, arm yourself with information, look out for local support groups, but don't forget tgere is a second option if it does not work out. Bf can be about luck, not all women can do it for whatever reason.

Don’t feel obliged to BF this time round if you don’t want to, FF is a perfectly safe and satisfactory alternative. Or you could plan to BF, have a go, but have all the formula bottles etc in case it doesn’t work out. Either way don’t stress.

Black/bleeding/cracked nipples are a sign that latch isn't right. No amount of lansinol will help that!

Tongue tie is the usual culprit (posterior and anterior...many midwives can't really recognise this and you may need a consultant). Thrush can also be uncomfortable for the baby and so makes them adjust their latch.

Very very often the remedies (shields! Pumps! Etc) make things worse without treating the cause. Once it is dealt with, bf completely changes. It really shouldn't be sore (uncomfortable or weird or getting-used-to, fine. Sore, something is wrong. And I have v sensitive nipples. Second compared to first time bf was a revelation)

Your baby might have had tongue tie or other issues might have been present.

At the end of the day, we need a lot of support with breastfeeding because it isn’t necessary something that comes to us instinctively.

So if I wereyou I’d look for decent BF support locally and see if you can attend a BF drop in session when baby arrives.

I used nipple shields for the first month, couldn't have bf without them. Combination fed my daughter until just after she turned one. I think you should give it another go but don't feel guilty if you switch to formula.

My first was in hospital for a week after she was born so I had to express to take my breast milk into her as I wasn't able to stay in the hospital with her. I wonder whether because she was used to being bottle fed by the nurses that she just couldn't latch onto me properly. After doing research it makes a lot more sense now! Thanks for your advice

If you’re using a pump, and you have the wrong size flanges that can definitely make your nipples bleed even if your baby’s latch is perfect. Midwives tends to give everyone the same size in hospital - certainly in my trust there was actually only one size available (large).

I ended up buying loads of different sizes from the manufacturer myself, I went to the milk spot/BF cafe but they only did actual BF advice, not pump advice (which is fair enough really).

My DS had a terrible latch and made me bleed. I used nipple shields, without which I wouldn't have got this far with breastfeeding. Was going to ditch them but when I tried, it hurt too much. So now we just use the shields. It's not the end of the world. Definitely worth trying if you have problems again this time.

I second the use of nipple shields, they were a godsend for us. I was in incredible pain with raw bleeding nipples. Baby had tongue tie but even when corrected his latch didn't improve, no matter what I tried. I have to say I went against the HCP advice; the lactation consultant, midwives, health visitor all frowned at my use of nipple shields and told me all sorts of scary stories about my milk drying up and baby getting thrush unless I stopped using them. None of it ever happened.

Baby is 4 months now and seems like his latch is finally improving so we are starting to wean off them.

Nipple shields never worked for me, but the lactation consultant recommended multi mam compresses. They are filled with lanolin so it's always on your nipples and you don't have to constantly reapply. It's also worth hand expressing an extra couple of stops after baby finishes and rubbing the milk into your nipple - super healing qualities.

Breast is only best if all other considerations are equal. Sometimes this isn't the case. Good luck whatever you decide.

Congratulations! I would certainly try if it was me. Especially if you have no problems at birth you can get baby latching right away.

I too had bleeding and scabs, the first two weeks were awful. I corrected her latching. By watching YouTube videos and used lansinoh cream with a gauze on them for a weekend and they were completely healed by the Monday!

The first 2 weeks as I said were awful and I wanted to give up, but she's 4 months old now and I love it. Its lovely and so convenient at night times!

Good luck!

Lanisoh cream is amazing. Our latch was good but my nipple were still sore and cracked in the first few weeks and this cream really helped.
Persevere if you can.. my baby is now 10 weeks and bf is easy

advantages and dis advantages for both .It should b 100% your decision not going off 1 sided advice forcing a mother to bf when she is struggling and does want to do is totally unfair .Be honest with your mw tell her you will make you own mind up and and please don't pressure you .For every up there is a down do what makes you happy you don't have to justify your decision to anyone

Of course you should try if that is the feeding route you want to choose, but if it doesn't work out then I would say do not put too much pressure on yourself and miss out on actually enjoying your baby because you are putting yourself through too much or under to much pressure. Your baby will be better off formula fed with a nice happy, relaxed mummy than breast fed with an unhappy, stressed mummy.

Breast is better for the baby, full stop. If you can breastfeed, you should at least try.

Not your tits, not your business.

Ignore this comment OP. Everyone else has been measured and reasonable.

Breast is obviously a bit better for the baby (let’s not deny science to make ourselves feel better, that would be loony) and it is certainly more convenient than making up a bottle.

Nipple cream like Lansinoh will help, but the best thing to do when embarking on any new skill is to pay someone to help you who knows what they are doing - so pay a breast feeding consultant to sort you out. If that doesn’t work it wasn’t meant to be and you can safely say you have tried your best and got the best advice from someone who knows what they are talking about.

It’s not expensive and NCT have ladies who do for free.

If you feel happier going straight to formula, do that. Fed is best, and don't let anybody make you feel like crap for any of your choices xxxx

In a similar boat - really didn’t enjoy it at all last time. This time round I’m armed with bottles etc from the outset and intend to mix feed. I’m going to feel no guilt if ff from the outset.

I find the pressure of being the sole feeder very claustrophobic too, much prefer to share the load of sleeplessness!

Feeding a second child can be totally different to number 1.
Lansinoh definitely (and use it before any cracking occurs).
Never had a midwife say “breast is best” is that really a thing? Congratulations on your pg

I had a nightmare in the first few weeks of feeding DD - she had a bad tongue tie, crap latch and my poor nipples were cracked and bleeding by day two. I knew it was what I wanted to do though so had her tongue tie snipped and, with support from the local breastfeeding group and a tearful phone call to the national breastfeeding helpline, I persevered and we are still breastfeeding now at 9 months.

There's no harm in trying again. You've got nothing to lose. There are proven benefits from breast milk even if it's just for a few days, or even just the first feed. Plus no two babies are the same and you might have a much easier ride this time. Finding breastfeeding difficult at first doesn't mean 'failure'. While it's completely natural it's still a skill that you both have to master. Some mums and babies have a natural talent, others (like me and DD) need a bit of guidance and practice.

If it's something you strongly want to do then I really would encourage you to push through those first few horrific hard weeks. The pain goes, nipples heal (Lansinoh is a must). Accept that you will spend most of your time sat on your bum feeding, that housework will have to wait. Accept practical help from anyone that can offer it.

For me the convenience and the enjoyment I've had from BFing from week 6ish to now has been totally worth how hard those first weeks were and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

However, if it's so bad that it's affecting your mental health or enjoyment of your new baby then you can change your mind at any point. That's not failing, it's deciding that it's no longer working for the two of you. Don't feel pressure from what anyone else is telling you (and that works both ways - I actually felt more pressure to give her formula than to continue breastfeeding which I desperately wanted to do, but if I was leaning more towards switching to formula I probably would have felt the opposite).

There is absolutely nothing wrong with formula if that's what suits you both best. Enjoy your lovely baby whichever way you decide to feed her.

Just a thought, if you do try bf then you can always stop at any point but if you start with formula then you'll not have the option to go back to bf.