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My mother inlaw constantly belittles me and makes stupid comments on my parenting

8 replies

natalie16175 · 24/01/2018 18:10

Hi I'm new this is the first time ive used this so hi all and thanks in advance for any reply's I just want to make sure I'm not going crazy because I want to drop kick my mother inlaw... NO JOKE
I met my Fiancé 9 years ago and after a while we decided it was time to have a family . He is a Slovak National so I hardly see his family. Which I am very glad of. my wee one is 8 months old Now but I'm having what I think is rude comments constantly from my mother inlaw. One of the first comments I had after a heartbreaking time of the baby not latching on and the decision being made to bottle feed because I wasn't producing milk my mother inlaw made the comment "breast is best some people are just not built to be a mother" I wasn't bathing him with soap or wiping him with baby wipes which was a problem for her within the first 2 weeks I done this because I was advised by my Midwife to avoid using soap and use cotton balls on his bottom for cleaning. His skin is still amazing. We went on holiday to visit them when the wee one one a few months old she kept making comments about my mother holding him and she couldn't it's £70 for a return flight there was nothing stopping her from coming she was expecting me to take a new born on a flight to a country which was sitting with temps of 40+. We got there st four in the morning went to bed bearing in mind my son had never met her I woke up at 7:30 like clockwork for feeding time and I had no son in my bedroom she had sneaked in at 6:30 woke him up dressed him fed him and took him out. She didn't even tell me she just came in and took him out. My fiancé loves his mum and was like "she was maybe just trying to help" "she would have thought it was nice to let you have a lie in" yes it would have been if I knew where on Earth my son was. She kept making snide comments that his milk was either too warm or too cold stopped him from napping because he will sleep better at night. Ruined his full routine. Then said he couldn't sleep in the cot only his pram which was lies and she would come in through the night and sneak him into her room. My fiancé's brothers girlfriend had a baby 2 months before me and I feel like she is constantly comparing my son to the older grandchild how he can do this and that and my wee one can't. My wee one is chubby I don't feed him rubbish he gets fruit veg meat and milk. He has stretched a bit he is sitting at 75cm. Today he sat beside my 3 year old niece and no word of a lie he is the same size as her. I took a picture and sent it to his mother father brother all the family everyone sent back nice messages and she sent me back translated it said "that's catastrophic you need to start feeding him less" I replied back "his weight is perfect for his height according to the health visitor" and you will know yourself they are honestly cheeky about how you do things. She sent me back well she is obviously blind I have asked all my friends and family and they have said he looks like a normal happy healthy baby. I'm afraid this comparing the two boys all the time will cause problems between them. Please tell me this isn't normal behaviour and I am not going crazy
Thanks 😊😊

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Kit1411 · 24/01/2018 18:42

God I’d be livid, well done for still making the effort to go see her, not sure I would unless the comments stopped.

ijustwannadance · 24/01/2018 18:48

If you stay at hers again, block/lock the door so she can't get into your room during the night.

Then tell her to mind her own fucking business.

EggsonHeads · 24/01/2018 18:48

Your husband really needs to reign her in and you need to stop giving her stuff to critisise. Just tell him to either tell her to behave properly or deal with her 100% on her own because you shouldn't have to put up with the itchy behaviour.

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natalie16175 · 24/01/2018 18:49

I send her pictures so she isn't missing out on him growing up but I feel like she's pushing me too far and I can't be bothered with the comments every time I send a picture. Bought a door bouncer because he loves jumping he was in it 2 minutes he Skyped her and I was a bad mother I will cause him to have back neck and leg deformations 🙈🙈 I was like wtf. Why would people make them then

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Cracker09jacker · 24/01/2018 18:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

natalie16175 · 24/01/2018 18:55

That's what I feel it's like anything I do with my son I have to justify. I've spoken to him about it and he just keeps saying " you know what she's like just ignore her comments" basically he wants me to ignore all her shit and soldier on like nothings happened and I can really feel I'm due to snap. 3,000 miles away and still too close

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Usernom1234567890 · 24/01/2018 20:07

Why are you still sending photos to her when she is being so rude in reply?
Your OH can send the photos, she's his mother, not yours. You need to disengage from her.

natalie16175 · 24/01/2018 20:28

This is what I want to do just wanted someone else's opinion incase I was being sensitive. I know I'm not. Sometimes it's good to hear some down to Earth no censored to the bone facts from people you don't know. People you know sugar coat the shit out of things to make you feel better when in matter of fact they make you feel worse because instead you think your batshit crazy

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