Don't know how to help 7 yr old with behaviour

[bellawoods2018]

Hi all,

I'm new to the site and hoping for some advice/shared experiences.

My little boy is 7 and doing great at school, achieving above expected on all subjects. But, his behaviour is becoming a bit of an issue. He has always been strong willed and I have always loved his confidence and fearlessness. His new teacher has sent home a letter stating he got a red card for calling out and then refusing PE (2 yellow cards, then they get a red card). I arranged to see her and she was really helpful and we talked about why he calls out (I asked him and he said she ignores him when he puts up his hand).

I spoke with my boy and explained what he needs to do at school and started a reward chart. He was excited. But, everyday since the red card he has still been shouting out, got sent out of PE and nothing has changed.

Please, can anyone offer any advice?

Feeling desperate to help him but struggling to know how. Thank you

It’s great that you’ve spoken to the Teacher and talked to him. Did the Teacher suggest and ways to help his behaviour?

Have you done all the usual? You know, make sure he gets enough sleep, cut down on gaming, upped his exercise, cut down sugar and food colourings?

Thank you for your reply.

He generally sleeps well, bed for 7, story and songs then he falls straight to sleep. Wakes about 6:30. He always looks tired though, bags under his eyes and yawning.

He eats well, hubby and I try hard to keep fit so we have quite well balanced diets. Lots of fruit, veg and limit sweets. He tends to only drink water and fruit juice. He does have problems with his bowel movements and I do wonder if this has anything to do with his behaviour. He did Beavers and Taekwindo but stopped both inan attempt to give him something to work towards.

Really hard knowing what to do to help him. Feel he should understand by now good and bad behaviour. Also, feel as though all I do is tell him he's not doing anything right and knocking his confidence.

What sorts of problems does he have with his bowels?

He's always had problems going to the toilet since he was potty trained. He can go days without doing a proper poo. Been to the doctors and they gave him some lactulose which was difficult to administer the correct amount. Poor thing would end up with stomach cramps, diarrhoea and it was really upsetting. We stopped using it. But he can end up going in and out the toilet all day and only passing bits (sorry for being so descriptive!).

Health visitors and Doctors never seem concerned but it seems pretty unusual.

It could well be his tummy that’s affecting his behaviour. I’ve got CMPA and when I’m having a reaction I can be horrid 😀

Does he have any other symptoms like mucus in his poo?

Thank you, it's nice to have someone to chat with about this. Really appreciate your suggestions 😊
Yeah, had thought it could be something like that. Tried him on Soya milk for couple of days only but made no difference. Do you think I should try for longer?

Can the doctors test for this?

I’m not really sure if they can test. They can test for Lactose allergy but my understanding is that this is more rare.

Unfortunately around half of the people who have an allergy to the protein in Cow’s Milk also have an allergy to Soya as the protein molecules are so similar.

This from Allergy UK gives a bit more detail. If he were mine, I’d think about going back to the GP and discuss his bowel problems. Whatever the cause it can’t be nice for him. Have you thought of trying him with a Probiotic too?

If his behaviour doesn’t improve over the next few days will you see the teacher again?

Oh, I didn't realise. I thought soya was very different. I will have a look into it a bit more.

Yes, I think I will try the doctor again. It isn't nice for him and it has been a real problem at times.

The teacher is introducing a sticker chart next week, hoping this helps. We always start the week fresh, forget about what's happened before and just keep trying to move forward.

He's a loving boy, full of energy and excitement. I just need to find a way to help him contain his enthusiasm for the right times/places.

Thank you for your help/support x