When did you start putting baby down at night themselves.

[readytostart]

When did use all start putting baby to bed with monitors on?

With our daughter we did it at 3 weeks old because I have insomnia and I was actually disturbing her sleep. With my son (who is now 11 weeks old) we started him in his own room at 6 weeks old for similar reasons, but he stayed downstairs with us in his Moses basket until we headed up to bed.

From 9 weeks we started putting him to bed at 8pm with his camera on.

But you're supposed to be disturbing their sleep. That's the whole point of keeping them in with you!

What @ElphabaTheGreen said. The whole point of them being in with you is that you disturb them so they don't go into too deep a sleep and forget to breathe.

People need to do some SIDS research. I don't mean that in a rude way either, if you're thinking of moving your baby before the recommended six months do your research first.

@ElphabaTheGreen not every hour... she was absolutely exhausted and unable to sleep. As soon as she went in her own room she went to a 4 hour sleep pattern.

She is now 6 years old and an incredible little sleeper... never ever have an issue with her, she is a superstar.

Our little boy is happy going to bed still awake and he falls asleep cooing. So hopefully he is heading in the same direction.

They both slept through the night from 8 weeks consistently (my daughter from 6 weeks) which has been a blessing as both times I have been back in full time work from 2 weeks after their birth as I have my own business and self employed.

@TheBlindspot it was discussed in length with my care practitioners. I am usually on medication to sleep which I was unwilling to take for obvious reasons. My weight plummeted from inability to sleep because I would disturb her then vice versa. This way it enabled me to get a few hours (I get a maximum of 4 hours a night) and for her to get a restful sleep.

My baby boy is 4 years old and I still stay with him until he falls asleep!

At three months(when I stopped bf) and babies never left the room again until morning. No co-sleeping. Minimal interaction. Never looked back. We all slept well thereafter.

I'm very much looking forward to DD sleeping through (awake 4 times with her last night) but even so - for the sake of her safety, a few extra weeks of broken sleep is well worth it.

DS is still in our room, but I started leaving him in the cot asleep from 6m onwards and going back to the living room till he woke around 11/12pm. Before that I'd keep him in the living room with us either in his crib or on my lap.

No baby monitor as we live in a flat and our bedroom is opposite the living room.

Baby moved to her own room when she was about 5 (years, not months)

Mine were in crib in our room from day one with monitors... we lived in a flat.. Baby to bed, me and DH in living room watching TV!
In cot in own room by 3/4 months.
I had never been told that they need to be in same room till 6 months?

Dd is in a cot in our room and she's 8.5 months. This is partly because we don't have another room to move her to yet but I also like being close to her. We didn't leave her on her own for naps until the recommended 6 months because of SIDS.

At about 7 months she was sleeping through from about 8pm so we decided to put her down in her side sleeper upstairs. I would then go to bed at about 10:30pm. There were a few false starts and a monstrous 8/9 month sleep regression where it alllllllll went out the window but she's now 14 months and has routinely gone to bed upstairs at 7pm for a good while now, I stay till she's properly asleep, usually takes around 20-40 minutes then the nights our own. She hasn't moved into her own room yet and naps in the same room as me during the day.

Yes of course you can put them to bed for an hour or two before you go to bed. Especially if you go up and check on them once or twice.

I kept DS downstairs until he was 8m because he didn't disturb us downstairs until then but there is nothing wrong with having a bedtime earlier if that is what suits you.

I am aware of the SIDS guidelines but I think it is overkill to suggest that the adults go to bed at 8.30 in order to facilitate them! You are allowed to use common sense and not follow everything 100% to the letter. Downstairs in evening if they don't disturb you. Otherwise upstairs is perfectly fine. You will still be spending the majority of the night in the same room.

If you've done research on SIDS, you'll know that the light sleep hypothesis is merely a theory, that we actually still have no idea what causes SIDS and we are not likely to ever find out as it is now thankfully extremely rare.

You would also know that the UK is the only country to explicitly state that it needs to be for every nanosecond of sleep - other countries have a more general recommendation to room share. And that six months is an arbitrary figure. The research doesnt have a specified date and various countries advise for different levels of time - we don't really know how long it's beneficial for although the peak time for SIDS is 8 weeks and drops sharply at 4 months.

It's also like any other health guideline, like avoiding raw chicken for example. If you accidentally realise halfway through your dinner that your chicken is undercooked it does not mean that you should panic and make yourself sick. It just means you should stop eating it and either cook it some more or throw it away. After chopping the raw chicken, it's fine to wash your hands in soap and warm water, it's not necessary to scrub them with bleach! It's the same thing with SIDS guidelines - they are best practice, not do or die, and must be taken in the context of reasonable family life.

I stay with my DS for all naps and early evenings as well as overnight, and will continue to do so until 6 months. He needs dark and white noise so it's not much fun! But it's not that long really, I'm already nearly at 4 months.

I take the point about the accuracy of the guidelines and following them to the letter, but if I did deviate from them and DD was then a victim of SIDS, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I'm not taking chances just to avoid a minor inconvenience.

That's how I feel, Duck. On a personal level, I couldn't cope if something awful happened and I hadn't followed the guidance. I would blame myself.

That's not to say that others must do the same. They are guidelines, not the law. But I feel they are there for good reason. It's up to the parents to decide what they want to do and weigh up risks etc, but it is worth considering how you think you'd feel about your decision if something did happen.

Exactly Duck. People are incredibly quick to jump in with the cosleeping guidelines and say it shouldn't be done but seem quite blasé about the SIDS risk of an unattended baby.

For me, we do cosleep. I couldn't put into words what I would do if something happened but I feel we've taken every step we can to minimise those risks. With the SIDS guidelines, there's no way to minimise it. They're either with you or not with you and no amount of monitors, checking on them, doors open etc changes that.

Parenting is constantly weighing up the risks and making your way through and the only advice is really to read the guidelines and make your decisions on those, rather than anecdotal advice from anybody.

We never used a cot. Co-slept until they (we have 6) were between 18 months & 2 years-ish...and they all went happily into their own room & bed then.

What ElphabaTheGreen said.

First 8 months (& i spend all my evenings running up & down the stairs ), second 18 months, third 20 months and 2&3 didnt actually sleep alone as in bed with sibling.

12 weeks. First night on holiday sharing a cottage with friends. Had previously been going up about 9ish with her. Stuck her in crib with monitor on her at 8pm and left her to it. Enjoyed a few drinks and went to bed ourselves around 10. Next thing we knew it was 8am!

Well, I'm okay with the risks I took, otherwise I wouldn't have taken them - I just think sometimes it can get a bit overblown when really SIDS can happen even if you follow all the guidelines to the letter, but it is very rare and anxiety about it shouldn't stop you from enjoying your baby's first few months. That's NHS and at least used to be Lullaby Trust's advice too BTW :)

I take the point about the accuracy of the guidelines and following them to the letter, but if I did deviate from them and DD was then a victim of SIDS, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I'm not taking chances just to avoid a minor inconvenience.

This is why both of mine stayed with me for all sleeps until after 6 months. If the worst did happen I would want to know that I did everything in my power to have kept them safe. I imagine the ‘what ifs’ are horrendous enough.