Impending dc2

[Jinglesplodge]

I'm due to have my second baby in the next couple of weeks and up until now my DS(3yo) has been really brilliant. He's been excited about the baby, happy to talk about it, keen to help, etc. I foolishly thought everything was going brilliantly.

This weekend we did all the big furniture rearranging (bednest crib arrived, built the changing table etc) and I think it has spooked him: the last day or so his behaviour has totally changed. He's acting out on purpose, doing things deliberately that he knows aren't allowed and taking any chance he can to contradict me, refuse to follow instructions, or make a mess.

Help! How do I make sure he's feeling loved and secure while at the same time enforcing the rules and boundaries that apply in his normal life? I don't want to get cross with him, but ignoring the bad behaviour seems to escalate it. I also don't want to reward the bad behaviour... Any experienced parents out there?

Have you sat him down and explained everything that is happening? I had DS2 when DS1 was just turning 5. I talked to him about everything as and when we did anything to prepare for his brother. I also regularly told him that he was still going to be my special boy, that he would be my special big boy and his brother my special little boy. He did get upset once, just before his brother was born, saying I wouldn’t love him anymore, just his brother. So I had a big chat with him about loving them both. I also got him to help set things up for baby, which he loved. And he even chose his brothers name. I think being involved, having everything explained and your love for them not changing bring emphasised can make a difference. Good luck!

Yes, we've been talking about it regularly for a long time now. There's been a lot of talk about how important he is, how special big brothers are, he's suggesting names and all kinds of things he wants to do with the baby and show him. It's literally just like a switch has flicked in the last day. Hopefully it's just a blip.

Maybe this is the threenager stage: if so it's terrible timing! He's been the world's happiest, most co-operative kid until now.

Has the furniture rearranging affected his bedroom or play space at all?
Or does he perhaps think that the baby is getting all this new stuff and he's missing out?